Quick! Say Something Nice!!

Sunday night ramblings..

2012-01-22T18:29:00.002-05:00

It's that time of the month again.. no, not that girly kind. The kind where I make lists. :) This list is basically to sum up the last few months of my life - since I've neglected to write anything down for such a long time. So, here goes.. recent happenings in Trina's world:

- I've lost an incredible 30 lbs and counting. Zumba is my friend. I have cut out fried foods and bread. The past few weeks have been harder - I have held steady and not lost any weight, but I'm getting there.

- Holy Canoli! I've joined a church!! Not only have I joined a church - I've also joined the church choir. It is powerful and really good for me.

- I'm still working at Chick-fil-a. No big news there except that I got promoted to kitchen manager. Whoopie. It's chicken. It's not life-altering. But, I love my coworkers and I've come to realize that that is a rare quality in a job and something to be cherished. I've started going out with them about one day a week - bowling, dinner, game nights. They are what I was missing in my last job and I'm proud to know each and every one of them.

- Hubs's music career is taking off quicker than we are prepared for - but it's really really exciting and scary. This time next year could be completely different, and we are ready to open our arms to this change. He deserves a shot at his dream. Don't we all.

- My sister is having TWINS. My niece is having a baby girl, and I am not having any more babies. Ever. :)

Alrighty, I'm done with my list. It was a short one this time - guess there's not a whole lot going on in Trina's world lately. I have no complaints.. and for the first time in about a year, I am not looking for a new job. Guess you could say I'm where I'm supposed to be right now. Hopefully it's just "right now" - as I'm pretty sure selling chicken is not a part of my long-term goal for myself. I am blessed to be able to provide for my family, and I am REALLY blessed to have the family that I have. This is an exciting year for us - I look forward to reading through my old blog entries to see how far we've come. If this isn't "our year" - I'm not sure what is.

FOURTEEN

2011-10-27T10:27:00.003-04:00

I HAVE to start off this post by saying - first and foremost - that I have, within the last month, lost FOURTEEN pounds. Fourteen. 14. It's pretty darn exciting news for me. I was inspired to lose weight by several things that all came together. First, a coworker of mine has recently lost about 30 pounds. Watching her incredible transformation has been quite the inspiration for me. She had a baby about two years ago (like me), and had just kind of let herself "go" (like me). Then, I took a NICCEE long vacation to the beach. If that isn't inspiration to lose weight, I'm not sure what IS. So, I bought a scale... and this became the first time that I actually acknowledged my own weight. I knew that I looked in the mirror and felt yucky and fat... but it was gut-wrenching to look at the scale and CONFIRM that I was yucky and fat.

So, I've been watching what I eat - trying to eat LESS more often... and working out just a WEE bit. I don't want it to be like a punishment, so I'm trying to make my exercise fun. My goal is to lose about 40 more pounds. It will put me at what is healthy for my height... and about where I was immediately after I had Novalee. (I was breastfeeding and looked amazing) I've joked to my husband that maybe I just need to start breastfeeding again. Although it was so beneficial for Novalee and such a bonding time between us, I would never again put myself through that unless absolutely necessary. Owwieeee!!! We can bond over other things, I mean really.

Besides the FOURTEEN pounds, our lives have been pretty steady. We have a vigorous schedule of work, football practice, hubs's gigs, and more work. We DO, however, try to fit in as many naps as possible - and we go on "adventures" when we can. I've made several new friends lately - and have found myself out of the house more often than not, Hubs has been driving to Nashville once a week for a songwriters gathering with some of Nashville's top songwriters, and when we meet up somewhere in the middle - we are happy and in love.

Halloween is approaching and we have painted and carved a few pumpkins. Novalee will be a bumble bee, and I'm working on my best Aubrey Hepburn costume. Hubs doesn't participate in Halloween, but we keep him around so he can take pictures of us. :) Novalee is getting cuter and more talkative every day. She tells me good morning every day, and kisses me goodnight. She will sometimes wake up and the first thing she says is, "Mama! I want some peanut butter. And some CHICKEN!" (We're working on that) She is stubborn and smart and sweet and really really really funny. She is my world, and that will never change.

Alright, enough mushy stuff. I'm thankful for so many things and also desperately in need of some change around the house. Looking for: a new job, a new house, or a new adventure. If you know of anywhere I can find any of these things - please let me know. :)

Over-thinking

2011-10-03T21:38:00.002-04:00

It's Monday night at the McMahan residence and I've just settled into my jammies with my Bud Light Lime and thoughts of waking up for work at 4:30 am. Man, I can never get used to that. Perhaps I should be tuning in to some Monday Night Football - but no, I'm semi-watching Cinderella for the 200th time. Cinderella + Bud Light Lime is still really no fun. I love that Novalee is asking for a second plate of broccoli - and that she is humming all of the songs in this movie. My husband is off pursuing his dreams... singing away at a songwriters meeting of sorts in Nashville... and well, this leaves me with nothing but my thoughts. (and Cinderella) Is it right that I'm semi-jealous of my husband sometimes? How wonderful and painful it must be to know exactly what you want to do with your life. I've watched him battle this passion for years now. Is it harder to KNOW what you want to do and struggle so hard to do it, or is it harder to have no earthly idea and wander around like a gypsy. ? I make it more difficult for him - I know. And it hit me today, somewhere between Cinderella mopping the floor and meeting her prince... that I've never been with someone that has so much potential. All of my previous boyfriends were seriously lacking in that department. I never really expected much out of them and it made it really easy when they ended up letting me down. I want so badly for him to succeed, but I'm also kind of afraid that he will. This is a very real emotion that I have - and I'm certainly not proud of it. What will happen? It is a heavy burden that I have placed on him and myself, and I know that he feels it deep down... that he knows that I'm afraid that he will succeed. How terrible is that. I'm still growing up and learning... apparently I am still selfish and immature and working through these things daily. I want him to succeed, I do. I just have this terrible feeling that I won't be a part of it - and I want to be, so badly. I want to be there when he hits that jackpot and all of his hard work is paid off. I want to be the first one to congratulate him, and throw him a party.. but having a two year old has made this extremely difficult recently. I'm trying to understand that I can't be there all of the time. It's really my job to be there for him in any way that he needs.. even if it means that I need to back off.

This rant is so long and ridiculous that it's surely boring you to death, so I'll finish it up. Life is hard and marriage is hard, but I am learning that a positive attitude can work wonders. I will be there for my husband for the rest of my life. I know that he isn't going anywhere - or he would not have made that vow to me.. he would not have chosen to create a life with me - and he would not still be here after all of my silly antics. I am extremely grateful that we ARE married - and that he lets me make mistakes, and he helps me grow and learn from my mistakes. Even if one of my mistakes is not letting him be who he is. He is willing to show me and walk me through this crazy world that I could not walk through alone.

New Beginnings..

2011-09-30T20:34:00.003-04:00

Alright. So, I've had this idea for several months - to shake up my blog and really mold it into what I'm living with right now. And, basically, I'm living with a two year old that says and does some pretty darn funny stuff. (I'm guessing as do most two year olds) I want to remember her this way - I want to remember how she learned things, and how she expressed herself. She is unique, and soooo beautiful. Our lives are so full of schedules and really it just feels like we pass her around like a beanbag - trying so hard to just do what we have to do. Novalee is the reason. Novalee makes it okay. So, I thought I would start this blog by talking about just that. Novalee. For starters, she likes:

Cinderella

Fishies

Horses

Singing

Dancing

Her blankie

Coloring

Taking baths

Going Night-night

So many things.

AND, my first story for this week is:

Scott (hubs) coughed the other night and Novalee was across the house and must have thought that he sneezed and yelled "BESSS YOUU DADDYY!!!" and he says of course, " Thank you, Novalee!" and before either of us could say anything else she yells, "BESSS YOUUU TOO, MAMA!!!" (I didn't sneeze) I think maybe she felt bad for only blessing daddy.

Lots of love,

Mama

Life. Is. Awesome.

2011-07-01T22:15:00.002-04:00

Wow. So, at this point in my blogging life.. it's either time to throw this thing away or overhaul it completely. Not sure. For now, I will update...

Since October of 2010 (which is the last time I blogged), so so sooo much has happened (of course. Such is life). One of the main things that happened is that I left my job of three years to go back to my very first job. Why, you may ask... well, many reasons.. but mainly because it was toxic and ugly and well, just plain disheartening every single day. For all you social workers out there - more power to you.. and thank you. So, what job did I go back to? Chick-fil-a. Yes, folks... I went from investigating child sexual abuse cases to serving chicken. And, wow.. what a relief. I'm not sure how long I'm supposed to stay at Chick-fil-a, but I was blessed with the option to go back (when I really didn't deserve it), and has really introduced me to some wonderful people. That was my favorite thing about Chick-fil-a ten years ago, when I started working there. The people. People that aren't infatuated with other peoples' downfalls. People that care about you, not backstab you. People that are NICE. REAL PEOPLE. Can you tell I'm a little bitter about my last job?

So, besides the serious change in the workweek.. Novalee. My beautiful daughter is even more beautiful and ohmygoodness SO smart! She began having conversations with us WAY before she turned two. And now her 2nd birthday is about a month away. She now tells us when she's hungry. And not just hungry.. but she wants specific things.. cheese, broccoli, chicken, turkey, chips, noodles, cookies, ice cream (she is her father's daughter 100%). She also tells us when she wants to play outside, go swimming, take a bath, change her diaper, go to the potty (yay!).. it's just flat amazing. One year ago I couldn't get her to say "mama". It really is the most spectacular part of this world. She loves: (in no particular order) Cinderella, the moon, thunder, swimming, Ernie (from Sesame Street), turkey, popsicles, coloring, jumping on the bed, her brothers, choo choo trains, running in circles, sunglasses, broccoli, her pillow, dogs, juice, and so many other things. And, she'll tell you she loves all of those things, and she'll even tell you she loves you. Now, how's that for an update since October.. when she was just learning to say "no". There have been hundreds of times when she's made me cry and smile at the same time. I could go on and on.. but I'll move along.

Some things really don't change.. and that's plum okay with me. Scott and I celebrated two great years of marriage this year. We even managed to get away to Asheville, NC for one whole day! I would say that it was one of my top 10 days of my life so far. We walked along the artsy city for several hours, stopping at an art fair.. ate fantastic food, went on a boat tour of Lake Lure, and (my favorite) stayed in the most gorgeous hotel that Asheville has to offer.. hot tub in the room, free champagne, valet parking, room service, just gorgeous. We really are meant to be together. I may have screwed up in other departments of my life, but I most surely picked the right person to spend my life with. We are different and so alike. I have been so proud of him lately. I hope he's proud of me. It's hard to be proud of going back to your first job in life.. but I have so many other things to be proud of, that it sort of makes up for that. :)

In just a few days we are taking our first family vacation. That's pretty darn exciting news around here. We don't even know what to do with it. But, until then.. I must go take Novalee outside so that she can wait for her daddy to come home, look for the moon, and follow the fireflies.

Life. Is. Awesome.

Feeling blue...

2010-10-18T14:41:00.003-04:00

I am feeling sad today. Let's just say that the stress levels around the McMahan house are BY FAR the highest they've ever been. We both feel like we're trying our darnedest - only to be buried by another round of ammo. This higher level of stress has caused an unusually high number of unnecessary arguements that would otherwise not exist.

I feel sad that I'm not as strong as I thought I was. It turns out that I am not always as fun as I thought I was. And that I'm also pretty difficult to have a serious conversation with.. I am extremely emotional, defensive, and just plain worn out by never feeling okay with choices I've made. I am lucky to have Scott, who I can lean on.. but I also feel like I've placed huge burdens on him that he just cannot handle or should not have to.

This is all very personal and really only written down to remind me of the good times.

I feel selfish when I want to have a good time. I feel dumb for expecting this to be easier. I want to jump up and down and scream and cry and scream some more until my throat is sore and my fists are red.

My wish, today, on this sad Monday is that Scott could know that being so sad has only temporarily changed me. I hope to be fully recovered from this sadness in a short time, so that I can get back to being a supportive, loving wife and an energetic, adoring mother.

Decision time....

2010-09-29T10:01:00.004-04:00

So, here's the scoop:
Let's talk about careers, shall we? My first major in school was Interior Design (what?), then Business Management (BOR-ING), Marketing (I can't sell anything to anyone), Graphic Design (never even signed up for a course), and eventually Journalism. Talk about a girl who can't make up her mind! This has all been extremely frustrating for me and has pretty much landed me a job as an Administrative Assistant answering phones and vacuuming carpets. The office that I ended up in investigates severe cases of child sexual abuse. (Does this sound like a career in Interior Design, Management, Marketing, Graphic Design, OR Journalism?) No. I held on tight to this job thinking that I would eventually be promoted to Victim Advocate. Didn't happen. So, I decided to get back into school and go ahead and get a degree since NO ONE ON THE PLANET will hire me for anything other than answering phones. It all sounded wonderful until I remembered that I STILL have no idea what I want to be when I "grow up" <-- if that ever happens. I have wasted hundreds of hours on classes that are now meaningless (textiles 1010 for instance) and I refuse to waste any more of my (precious) time taking classes that could potentially be meaningless to a future degree. Let's also talk about the value of a degree, shall we? I won't mention any names, but E you know who I'm talking about.. I have SEVERAL, no let's make that DOZENS of friends with degrees - some with MASTER'S degrees - that are unemployed/working at Target/living with Mom right now because no one will hire them. How much is a degree really worth nowadays? Is it worth the 12 hours a week that I'm spending in a lab in front of a computer? Is it worth the 4 to 5 days that I go to work at 8 am and don't come home from school until 9 pm? Is it worth only seeing my daughter for approximately 16 hours a week??? 16 HOURS!! (And 1/4 of that time she is SLEEPING)
What I'm trying to say here is that I've reached a very crucial time in my life.

I am changing my major one FINAL time to... (drum roll please).... Teaching. There will be NO - I repeat - NO changing my major after this decision is made. I figure that the education system is already screwed up enough, how could hiring me make it any worse? Ha! It's time for me to stick with something and see it through to the end. If teaching doesn't make me happy, then honestly.. what will? Sure, I would love to lay around the house, make jewelry, bake unhealthy cakes, travel the country, and sing songs about freedom.. but I wouldn't be out there making a difference to society, and by-golly that is my obligation as an American Citizen! That sounded terribly cliche, but I believe that it is true. So, starting today you are reading the blog of a future teacher! (Don't cry)
I want some feedback here, for those of you who know me pretty well.. to teach or not to teach? That is the question.

A different kind of music shop

2010-07-23T13:04:00.019-04:00

I recently read an article about a Knoxville couple who quit their jobs to start growing and selling organic produce. I have often had many dreams of being my own boss; some of which included: my own shoe store, coffee shop (although I couldn't tell you the difference between frappuccino and cappuccino), flower shop, graphic design company, practically anything to relieve me of an office environment. I am so thoroughly inspired by people who take the plunge and do what feels right to them. One of these people who took this said "plunge" is Josh Sidman, the owner of a new kind of business called The Parlor.

First of all, Meet Josh:

Josh has a resume that you couldn't make up if you tried. A few highlights in his career include: working on Wallstreet for the successful global investment banking and securities firm, Goldman Sachs; where he traveled from New York to London to Tokyo to you-name-it. Also add to that list: Actor/bartender in New York, trying his hand at TV and film production in L.A, and musician. Josh is an incredibly talented mandolin player; which I might add that he had never even picked up until he was 27 years old. He started taking himself seriously as a musician and spent 7 years touring in various bands from New York to San Fransisco. One of those bands, The Earl Brothers, eventually led him to Knoxville, TN; a placed where Josh admits that the music scene is something really spectacular. He even surprised me a little when he compared Knoxville to other well-known artistic communities like Asheville and Portland.

Most recently, Josh began his most ambitious project yet, The Parlor. The Parlor is what he likes to call, "a different kind of music shop", and it truly is. Not only do they not sell one single brand-new instrument (they specialize in high-quality vintage instruments), they also offer a unique style of teaching music lessons (more of a mentorship), an instrument repair shop, and even catering services provided by Josh's business partner, Rita Cochran. Many of their recipes call for fresh produce grown from their very own back yard. Josh is also finishing up renovations to the downstairs of the 100 year old building located in North Knoxville, and he expects to be finished sometime around December 2010. He plans to transform it into a deli/coffee shop and most importantly a listening room that will house performances and provide a comfortable space for people to eat and hangout. Josh says that his inspiration for The Parlor was watching the environments that his musician friends were teaching lessons in. A majority of the time the parents would stay and wait for their kids to finish their lessons, and really had no place to go during that hour or so. The Parlor will hopefully provide a great environment for those parents to relax, and the students to learn. While the downstairs is currently under construction, I highly recommend giving Josh a call to peek at his amazing collection of vintage stringed instruments upstairs, some of which are over 80 years old. You can check out his website and support this innovative business by visiting: http://www.theparlorknoxville.com/

Just a few of the many vintage instruments from The Parlor:

The view from the upstairs of The Parlor:
(part of the vegetable garden)

Sing me a song....

2009-11-22T15:12:00.003-05:00

A few goings on...
It's winter time here in the Smoky Mountains. The love of my life is singing his heart out to a crowd that just turns up the football game to tune him out. It's not their fault. They came here to watch football. We came here to make $150... regardless of how many people listen. I love him for putting himself out there like that. My job seems so easy when I think about it......

aMAZE-ing Autumn!

2009-10-02T11:26:00.003-04:00

I found this picture from our trip to the corn maze right around this time last year... I can't wait to go again!! Another reason to love living in a small town..

A FAIR-ly awesome day...

2009-09-30T15:27:00.006-04:00

We went to the county fair a few weeks back.. and here are a few highlights. Boy, do I love livin in a small town! ;) My very first Turtle Race!!

Candy apples.. yummmmm

Honesty...

2009-09-30T11:10:00.008-04:00

So, my good friend, Emilee posted a blog that inspired me to come up with 10 honest things I have learned about myself in the past year.

See, the past year for me has been so drastically different. In less than 365 days I: quit smoking, quit drinking, got married, had a baby, and adopted 2 step-children. (just to give you an idea of how totally different my life is).

1. I learned that I do not have to be tied down to ANY addiction: I smoked a pack a day of Camel Menthol cigarettes for nearly 5 years. (At $5.00 a pack I might add) I would often choose a pack of cigarettes over food, gas, bills, or any other NECESSITY. Smoking was something that I was never ever proud of - and it controlled my life for five long years. I was constantly coughing - coming down with bronchitis on NUMEROUS occasions, and even continued to smoke through my coughing fits. (classy, eh?) I was also a pretty consistant drinker - going out nearly every weekend because well, I just didn't know what else to do. Alcohol was turning me into a mean, unhealthy person.. and one summer day last year I decided that enough was enough. I quit smoking and drinking just one day out of the blue. Never to return again. And just as my body started to regain its' health again, a few months after quitting, I found out that I was pregnant. Apparently my body just wanted to be cleaned out and healthy enough to grow a baby. ;) So, #1 thing I've learned: I can conquer any addiction. (except possibly my freaky addiction to water... but that shouldn't count)

2. I can commit! That's right, I got married. I actually CAN commit to someone!!! I even unpacked all of my belongings and set up a HOME! I am no longer just a nomad, wandering around Knoxville looking for a nice couch to crash on.

4. Being a mom isn't as scary as it looks - (not yet anyways) I had NEVER, I repeat - NEVER changed a diaper before Novalee came along. I had probably only held a baby for a total of 10 minutes also. Something about being pregnant for 9 long months prepares you for all of that. A natural instinct kicks in - and you immediately can tell what your baby needs. (90% of the time) What an amazing experience to say the least.

5. I like to read!! - I discovered the public library and the rest was history. I think 2009 was a great time to discover my love for reading. Thank you to all of my bloggy friends who recommended books for me to read - I'm still working on that reading list!

6. I deserve more at work - more benefits, more money, more respect. Although my relationship with my job is a love-hate one... I realized this year that I hate it more than I love it. And when the bad outweighs the good, it's time to move on.

7. There are better things to do with my time than watch T.V!! - Right around the time I quit smoking and drinking, I also gave up television. Partially b/c of finances and partially b/c I was just OVER it. G-A-R-B-A-G-E!!! I also put a ban on rated R movies - and will never ever ever again watch a Horror movie. Ever. (I have Dark Knight and Halloween to thank for that) I realized that all of those movies were damaging my soul - really, truly hurting me, putting negativity in a place that God intended for pure, positive things. So, I cleansed myself from all (well, as much as I can possibly control) things violent, scary, and cruel. I think that this one thing has changed me more than any other thing on this list. I have far better things to do than to watch trashy television! (does that make me sound old?)

8. I am strong! - I've mentioned throughout this blog that I was put through some pretty insane ailments while I was pregnant.. (head lice, swine flu, LABOR) I managed just fine. Who knew?!

9. Sometimes I just need a good cry - letting out my emotions instead of bottling it up. Wow. What a concept. I figured out this past year that it's okay to ask someone for help... and that more often than not, family and friends will rise to the occasion and BEG to help. I've learned that it is OKAY to not have it all figured out.. and that a lot of people know more than I do! (okay, so maybe I was just a little slow.. )

10. True happiness is easy!! - My husband makes me the happiest woman in the World. No doubt about that. I don't ever have to be miserable again. I will never have to settle for things that I know aren't right. I will never put myself in a situation that makes me unhappy. I will always fight for my God-given right to be happy... and I will NEVER let anyone take that away from me.

Can I get a "Amen" around here!?

Okay, enough preachin' from me. This list was good for me today. Thanks to Emilee for the inspiration. :) OH, and here's a few more pictures of baby Novalee.... just for fun.

On maternity leave....

2009-09-22T09:52:00.002-04:00

Ahh.. the bittersweet taste of finishing my maternity leave. On the one hand, I could never be "ready" to leave my beautiful baby girl for 8 long hours to sit at a desk and cater to other peoples screaming children. And yet, I am completely ready to get that all-important paycheck to ensure that my baby's bottom is secure with diapers and her tummy is full of milk. My office missed me. They truly did. I was welcomed back with open arms. It's a nice feeling to be missed, and a terrible feeling to be the one missing someone.

My six weeks at home, I have to say, were very productive and also filled with extreme laziness. I birthed a child = Productive.
I slept until noon = Laziness.
I read A LOT of books = Productive.
I laid on the couch until 2:00 = Laziness.

Fabulous.
I loved spending every minute with my husband and our newest member of the family. I got used to our routine of sleeping late, making googly-eyes at Novalee, cooking dinners together, rinse, lather, repeat.

Is it too soon to retire?

Spit-up-a-thon

2009-09-07T21:42:00.002-04:00

An adjustment of sorts....

2009-09-06T14:38:00.003-04:00

Sometimes I can be a selfish person. Maybe it's because I'm the youngest of LOTS of children... or maybe it's just the way that I was born. Having Novalee has taken away some of that selfish nature, but has also increased it in ways that I wasn't anticipating. Let's elaborate:
My maternity leave.
I busted my tooshie off at work - not taking any extra days off of work for the entire year - so that I could use my paid time off as part of my leave. I also filled out pages and pages of paperwork, begged my boss to even LET me have 6 weeks off, and worked up until THE DAY I went into labor. How did that work out for me? Nada. Three weeks before my labor, I was hospitalized with the flu for an entire week and completely drained all of my saved paid time off. Three weeks later, I gave birth to Novalee and found out that we would be watching Scott's two boys (ages 9 and 13) for the duration of 3 weeks. Now, don't get me wrong - I absolutely adore these boys. But, (here's where I start to feel selfish) I was NOT planning on having them year for nearly ALL of my maternity leave. They are great boys, and are ALWAYS wanting to help with the baby.. but it is something that I just wasn't prepared for. In my mind, I had completely earned 6 weeks off of work of just me and Scott bonding with this new person. Did not happen. What DID happen was that Scott's boys both managed to catch some form of the Swine Flu - leaving them SICK at our house for an entire week, coughing all over me and our newborn baby.
Now, imagine how terrible I feel even writing this. I just want peace in our house. I want to take naps with Novalee without someone asking me if they can have Kool-aid. I want to hold Novalee without someone begging for me to let them hold her. I want to put her in the car without 6 hands trying to do it for me. I want to surround her with love and I don't want to carry this frustration around with me. I want to love the boys without feeling like they are out to get me, testing me, punishing me for all of the work that I did for nine months. Also, add the fact that my loving, amazing husband has been playing a ton more shows (meaning he is gone in the evenings making beautiful music) - leaving me home with 3 kids who are bored out of their minds looking to me for entertainment, when I can only do so much with NO MONEY and a newborn baby. Talk about the OPPOSITE of a relaxing 6 week maternity leave. I have 2 weeks left until I go back to work, and honestly I think I'm just ready to go back NOW. That's how flippin selfish I am. What is wrong with me? Why can't I just be at peace with all of this? Scott seems to be managing just fine. Why is it so much harder for me to adjust to this? Is it somehow related to the hours of sleep deprivation that comes with having a baby?

Long Time Gone

2009-08-23T21:58:00.012-04:00

I'm not sure how to start this post. In the past month I have:

- Conquered the flu while 8 months pregnant (if you call near-death the flu)

- Conquered childbirth (a 9lb. 3 oz. beauty)

- learned that I can hold/change/take care of a newborn baby

- had severe financial uncertainties

- cleaned nearly every baby related item known to man (four to five times each)

- read 4 books that were all the same (no thanks to Nicholas Sparks)

- lost 35 lbs. (why wasn't that at the top of my list??)

- blown two tires
and... did I mention I lost 35 lbs?
Okay, now that I've brought everyone up to speed.. can you believe that I popped a 9 lb. baby outta there?!!? Seriously. AND, my pants fit again (better than ever I might add), I can bend over to pick stuff up, I can hug my husband without twisting my belly to the side, I can lay down on my stomach, I can eat an entire plate of food, heck.. I can even see my own feet! (which, I have to admit look absolutely stunning when they're not swollen and throbbing) Sadly, the only thing that's missing is the wonderful ability to balance stuff on my tummy. Oh well, such is life. But, enough about ME. I had a BABY. Her name is Novalee Ray and she is the most amazing thing that I've ever done. Maybe it's a new mom thing, or maybe I'm just extra paranoid. But I love her so much that she keeps me up at night.. I just stare at her and make sure that she's okay. When she has the hiccups - I count them in my head. When she doesn't make a noise for 4 or 5 minutes - I place my hand on her chest to make sure she takes a breath. When she whimpers - I feel sad.
Moral of this baby story is that I am so unbelievably proud of myself for providing her a healthy body to grow in, and a loving house to live in. Our entire family is so lucky to have Novalee. She is a gift that I will always cherish. And now... a few more pictures of Novalee's cuteness in action!

Mohawk Novalee

Dressed up Novalee

Sleepy Novalee

Ticked-off Novalee

And, my personal favorite.. Pirate Novalee

A Preview...

2009-08-17T22:11:00.006-04:00

Yes, our baby girl has arrived...

Needless to say, we've been busy loving her, feeding her, and changing diapers. :) I will try my hardest to write a much-needed blog post about the birth of Miss. Novalee.. but until then, I hope these pictures tide everyone over for a short while.

The fever of 09'

2009-08-03T11:51:00.004-04:00

Obviously, a recap is in order around here. I had left the building for quite some time and now I'm back in full swing.. preparing for the birth of this baby girl. (who, by the way, will be joining our family NEXT monday, August the 10th - yes, it's crazy that you can plan these things) Let me first start off by saying that - having beat the LICE outbreak, nearly quitting my job, and the endless financial struggles... I officially topped all that off and kicked my own ass last week. Last Sunday morning was the start of a very, very, extremely long and difficult week for me, Scott, and this baby. That Sunday was the start of a five-day episode of the most horrific fever I've ever encountered. Now, to simply say "fever" would not do this sickness justice. It went from 99, to 98.7, to 103 and back, for DAYS and DAYS on end. It baffled countless Doctors and nurses, left me curled up in fits of sweat, chills, tears, anger, more tears, and intense pain. At one point they quarantined the hospital and put me on my own floor and labelled me as having the Swine Flu. That's right. The. Swine. Flu. I will go ahead and spare you from listening to me whine and moan about the 700 different invasive procedures, monitoring, sleeplessness, and pure misery that I was put through... and I'll just summarize by saying that I have never in my life been so sick. That being said, I am healed! - And now thoroughly freaked out/excited/nervous that I'm being induced this time next week and all of the anticipation of seeing this baby will finally be realized.
Oh, did I mention that said job just informed me that we're receiving a 4% paycut, effective immediately? Yah, add that to my list of "why I should quit after maternity leave". The list is quite long now. If my vocabulary was a little bit more vulgar, I'd find 400 different ways to say, "bite me"... but, honestly, I'm just too darn exhausted.
As always, thank you for the love and support that you bloggies provide me...
Everything. Will. Be. Okay.

It all comes down to this...

2009-07-24T08:27:00.003-04:00

Well, seeing as how I received very little advice on what to do when your boss catches you applying for another job... I will now explain how I got myself in that situation in the first place, and try to make sense of it on my own. Let's recap this week, shall we?
Monday - Busy work day. Emotional. Powerful day that sort of knocked me around until bedtime. (was also still feeling itchy from the lice outbreak)

Tuesday- The day started off good and ended very badly. At about 4:00 pm- the cramping began.. what I now know as contractions. (not Braxton Hicks contractions either) Telling you that they hurt would be an understatement, but I am well aware that this is only the beginning of it all - so I won't go into it. Anyways, the contractions came and went for a few hours, I took a nap, woke up, and suddenly felt like our house was on fire. I had a fever. 95, then 96.7, then 99, 99.9, then finally 100 degrees. (still feeling the contractions all along) So, we did what any normal pregnant woman would do - we waited it out for quite some time, hoping that the fever would calm down. It's 10pm at this point - who wants to spend the rest of the night at the hospital unless it's absolutely necessary? I DO! I DO! ME!! So, we ended up at the hospital at 11ish and stayed till about 2ish in the morning. Fever up. Fever down. Fever up. Fever down. For a few hours I thought the baby was coming. But no. They sent us home with a recommended pattern of taking Tylonol, rest, lots of fluids, and a note stating that I could not work the following day so that my fever would slow down. (sounds reasonable, right?) I spend the rest of that morning in probably the most pain that I have yet to experience in my short life.. tossing and turning, moaning, crying, shaking, standing, sitting, you-name-it.. I tried it.

Wednesday- I call my boss first thing in the morning to let her know that I can't come in. (keep in mind- this is my VERY FIRST day of calling in during my entire pregnancy) I knew that they were busy and understaffed- but I also knew that my body was not going to allow me to make it in to work. So, I did what I had to do - for my health and for the baby's health. By the middle of the day I was feeling MUCH better, and the fever eventually calmed itself down.

Which brings me to Thursday - I come to work and one of the very first things that I do is apologize to my boss for causing them to work extra hard the day before. Maybe that was my mistake - apologizing. To my apology - this was her (boss) response, "Well, you're gonna be uncomfortable while you're pregnant. You can't just stay home whenever that happens". So I tell her that I wasn't "uncomfortable", I had a fever.. and the doctor was concerned by it. That's why I stayed home. So boss's reply is, "Well, you always have a fever when you're pregnant. You just do". Okay, first of all - NO. Not true. Why would she say that??! A high fever at 37 weeks pregnant is NOT a normal thing.. you don't have to be a registered nurse to know that.
So, after this little spat of ours, I receive a lovely phone call from a woman at our corporate office 2,000 miles away. She called to explain my maternity leave to me. She pretty much just called to say that there is no maternity leave. My boss does not HAVE TO accept my leave of absence, and can furthermore decide to terminate me at anytime. Nice to know. I kind of knew this all along - but I just had to hear it straight from them I guess. I do not get paid while I'm away, and I am not guaranteed my position when I come back.
Sweet. That's the kind of love that you show to a dedicated employee? Nice. Very nice.
So, this all leads me back to where this post started. She caught me filling out an application for another job. This incident, among many, many, many other things has now shoved me into a job search at 37 weeks pregnant. I am confident that I can find a better job, with better benefits, making more money.. but I'm just not sure that any other job will be as rewarding as working with kids who need someone to hear their cries. I will most likely lose the sense of pride I feel when a child molester gets put away because of the work that I do. I have put up with the people that I work with for nearly two years - just for that reason alone. But I have also put up with steep hikes in my health insurance, extreme emotions, no pay raises, fights, secrets, and finally...they have broken my spirits for the last time. There have been numorous times during my pregnancy when I have felt discriminated against by my employers, and if I were a smarter, perhaps more evil, woman than I would consider filing a lawsuit. But I think I will just let it go and convince myself that they know not what they do. I am confident, however, that I am smart enough to know when to walk away.
So, boss lady can take my maternity leave and officially SHOVE IT.

Because you love me, that's why!

2009-07-21T14:06:00.003-04:00

What the blogging world has taught me lately is: Ask and you shall recieve.
Seriously, I wanted to vent and whine about my recent experiences with pregnancy and head lice.. and you let me go on and on and on.. and even dished me out some friendly advice and sympathy. Then I was in search of some good books to read and the responses were overwhelming and will surely keep me busy for the next, oh, year or so. (because I am the World's slowest reader, for one.. and for two, because my reading list is now gigantic) This leads me to my next mission. Money. Bloggies, we seem pretty close now... I think that it is time that we all consider making a teenie-tiny (or huge) donation to the "Get Trina Out the Poor House - Fund". If there were any other respectable way to do this.. then, well, I'm completely unaware of such a path. (*If you are trying to deceifer the sincerity in this post- than just assume that this is for real and consider helpin a sister out)

Well, that was worth a shot.

Anywho... my coworkers are officially taking bets on when this baby's comin out. My due date is August 16th, but for some reason everyone thinks this baby is coming sometime in the first week of August instead. MY OWN personal guess is August 8th - but it might just be wishful thinking. If you'd like to make your own guesses, please feel free to do so in my comments. (along with your donation) Did I mention that I'm now accepting donations?
Oh, and can someone explain to me why my head still itches? The lice is "supposedly" removed... so why do I keep clawing at my poor scalp???????

Thank you for always listening, cyberspace. (except when the internet is down.. then you're kind of pointless)
Love,
Trina

Bookin' it

2009-07-17T13:20:00.003-04:00

I've been a stellar reader lately. BOOKS! I found my home at the public library and I've dived head first into reading. Okay, so I've only finished 2 books - but that's some sort of record for me and I'm proud of myself. I started by reading "Still life with Woodpecker" by freaky, quirky, genius Tom Robbins... and then went the cheesy route with "A Walk to Remember". (the book is 100 times better than the movie by the way) And now I'm onto "The Color Purple". I have honestly no clue what this book is about, as I've lived under a rock for quite sometime now.. so don't spoil it for me.

But what I'm really needing right now is some book advice. Anyone read a good book lately?? I just need another excuse to go to the library. (yah, I'm that nerdy)

Thanks bookworms!
:)

Head-Critters

2009-07-16T13:21:00.004-04:00

Lice - The very last word that anyone wants to hear. Throw in some 3rd trimester pregnancy, swollen feet and bloating... and you get ME. Now, I'm not usually one to whine and complain and tell you how horrible my life is.. but I'm really really starting to become that person... slowly...
Somehow I contracted LICE a few days back and shared it with my entire family. (because I'm sweet like that) Yesterday I felt cursed - like someone was poking at my big, pregnant voodoo doll and wishing evil towards our family. It's not just the lice. Really. The past few months have been very hard for us - a struggle that I'm not proud of. Money has been tight, the structure of our house was failing us, large family issues have popped up periodically, my job has been emotional, and lice was pretty much the icing on the cake. So, I cried. I sat on our bare mattress, with mayonnaise dripping down my forehead (lice treatment for pregnant chicks is soaking your hair in mayo for 8 hours), holding my belly to fight off the increasingly painful contractions...and I cried. I cried and Scott held me and let me cry it out... and then it was over. Then I could do nothing but laugh. I guess when things get so hard, the only thing left to do is laugh it off. Scott reminded me that I'm blessed and that we can get through anything together. (He also reminded me that his ex-wife now has lice.. and well, that kind of made me laugh even harder)

We just might be the most painfully optomistic family that ever lived...

Three Words

2009-07-15T20:29:00.001-04:00

I.
Have.
Lice.

2009-07-15T10:01:00.000-04:00

2009-07-14T09:32:00.002-04:00

The Itchy and Scratchy Show

2009-07-13T08:40:00.004-04:00

So, this pregnancy thing isn't so bad...

My popularity soared once I got pregnant, I get tons of cool baby stuff for FREE, if I crave something - it is mine, oh and NAPS... I. Love. Naps. But, things aren't always fine and dandy around the maternity world... I'm moderately uncomfortable 85% of the time, I practically LIVE in the restroom, and I can't bend over when I drop stuff. (which is constant) Still, I'm confident that the perks of pregnancy outweigh the negative aspects most of the time. Yep, this pregnancy thing is pretty easy once you get the hang of it.

...And then came the itching.

I'm talkin: head-to-toe, deep tissue, 24-hours-a-day, "I'm gonna tear off my skin" kind of itching. In the past three or four days I have developed some sort of freak-allergy or something of that nature. I have never in my life been so itchy. When do I reach the point of calling a doctor? What will they do in the first place?? Prescribe me some anti-itch cream to smother all over my body every 2 hours? Is that what I want? Pretty much every drug known to man is unsafe for pregnant women anyway. Is there anything that they can do?! I'm reaching the point of panic... because if this doesn't go away, I'm not sure what I'm gonna do to my own skin. Who needs that top layer anyways?

H.E.L.P. M.E.

Who eediot NOW, Bob?

2009-07-09T11:18:00.000-04:00

Diary of a Preggo-Eggo

2009-07-08T12:36:00.002-04:00

Two things:

1. To Wii or not to Wii...
Just like most of you, this past weekend was a 3 day weekend; given to me so that I could have more time playing with explosives, eating hotdogs, and sleeping. Happy Birthday, U.S.A. (this post is delayed.. and I'm sorry) Although I did have a blast getting paid for sitting on my rump.... it was also a slightly frustrating weekend with the boys. I love them. I do. Dearly. They are hilarious and sweet, creative and fun. But, something had to give this weekend... I was feeling too pregnant and too high-strung. SO, we borrowed my mom's Wii - to entertain the boys. What a brilliant idea! Seriously, it was a brilliant idea......................
Until my husband found Tiger Woods Golf.
And, I've lost him forever.

So, to Wii or not to Wii? That is the question.

2. No, I am not "about to burst", but thanks.

Yes, my belly is gigantic. I turn to the side and it's, "KAPOW!". It does sort of look like I'm carrying twins. But I am not. I still have 6 more weeks left, people.. so please stop acting like I should be in route to the ER. Stuff grows when you're pregnant. Picture an 8 lb. bowling ball - now picture yourself SWALLOWING that 8 lb. bowling ball. I. Am. Pregnant. Again, stuff grows when you're pregnant. I'm extremly thankful that the only part of me that has grown has been my belly. I have not swelled, bloated, packed on flubber, nor stored extra reece's cups in my tushy. Why is everyone so shocked that I have 6 weeks left??! Am I really that huge?

Let it all go.

2009-07-01T15:35:00.005-04:00

I've been holding back a hateful blog post. Oh, how I just want to sit down, type vicious cuss words, slam my fingers on each letter as I type them, and not regret one word.. I am so mad lately. I can pretty much summarize and tell you that my job and my coworkers are rotting my brain. They are nosey and snobby and judgemental and sometimes just plain cruel. I'm not sure why they pretend to be interested in my pregnancy. They hold no sincerity in their hearts when they ask me things like, "What are you gonna do about childcare?", "Is your husband working yet?", "How are you going to afford this baby?". They look down at me and treat me like I was born yesterday. Really, those questions are for Scott and I to figure out - unless you're planning on giving me a raise or making a donation. Yes, times are tough right now. My amazing husband will never ever let us go without. We might just barely slip by, we might not eat sushi every night - or go on extreme vacations, or we might not even have CABLE (Heaven forbid!)... but we are completely fine. When times are tough for one of us, the other one picks up the slack. It's just how it is. Isn't that how marriage is supposed to be? I know that Scott is trying his absolute hardest to do what's best for his family - and I'm honestly sick of having to explain myself to the people that are responsible for my lousy paycheck. (might I add that I have not received a pay raise in the nearly 2 years that I've worked there - and have experienced not ONE, not TWO, but THREE hikes in my health insurance in that time period - which puts me at making $200 LESS monthly than when I was hired)

I just want them to get off of my back and let me be happy. I married my best friend two months ago, today. I am proud of him for everything that he is... and I will never beat him up for trying his hardest to support us in the best way he knows how. So, unless my coworkers are going to offer him a job or provide me with more income - I seriously do not want to hear it. ANY. MORE.

The End. :)

2009-06-26T12:27:00.002-04:00

So, I didn't win the scooter. Bum-ER. It is okay though. Really. I think I handled it quite nicely considering my typical temper tantrums and such. I will move on with my life.

And then buy myself one when no one's around to stop me.

Now, I'm just trying to get through this Friday afternoon at work. My day is mainly slow, mushed up with spurts of little kids asking me funny questions. The funniest of those questions (or statements) are usually somehow directed at my large, pregnant belly. Which leads me to....

The Top 10 Reactions to my Pregnancy from the loving children that I work with:

1. "I know what's wrong with you!..... PREGNANCY!"

2. "Why is that so big?" (pointing at my belly)

3. "Are you having a girl or boy?" (my answer - GIRL!) Their response, "WHY???!"

4. "Are you having a black baby or a white baby?"

5. "Hey lady, are you okay?" (watching me doze off on a beanbag chair)

6. "What's wrong with your stomach? Did you just eat lunch or somethin?"

7. "How many babies you got in there?!"

8. "How does the baby get out of there?" (good question, kid)

9. "Why are you walkin so funny?"

10. "How did you put a baby in there!?"

It must be pretty confusing to be a kid.

Because I said so, that's why

2009-06-23T09:48:00.004-04:00

The "because I feel like making a list" List:

Have I mentioned how big my belly is lately? Like I swallowed a basketball BIG? Like someone keeps inflating me BIG? Like I couldn't fit in an intertube if I tried BIG? It's big. Very big.

Work is brutal today. There are absolutely no appointments, the boss lady is at the beach, the weather is gorgeous outside, and my favorite husband is playing a show that I can't go to. I'm reaching past beyond my better judgement by trying NOT to fake a migraine so that I can go home. (I'm a strong believer in Kharma.. and if you ask for a migraine.. you shall receive one, maybe even two)

I'm so excited about the potential to win a sweet scooter this Thursday. My hopes are high.

Our little baby girl is 32 weeks old now - only 8-ish more weeks to go! If I were to give birth RIGHT NOW, her chance of survival is pretty strong. She's growing every single minute, wiggling around, and perfecting the "hiccup". It's amazing. Really, amazing. I can't quite wrap my head around it all... but THERE-IS-A-BABY-IN-MY-BELLY. I know, it's crazytalk.

I rocked out the public library yesterday. Where has it been all my life??? Movies, Cd's, Books, Magazines.... ALL FREE! Maybe the library just wasn't as cool when I had to go there for schoolwork.

Crossin my fingers...

2009-06-22T13:33:00.003-04:00

So, a few months back I spotted a local contest - giving away a scooter. At that moment I saw my life flash before my eyes. I would own that scooter, no matter what it took. I forced my mom, coworkers, and husband into entering the contest with me... only by promising me that if they actually WON the scooter, that they would immediately hand it over to me- no questions asked. They all complied and that was that. So, here I am on my lunch break.. nearly 8 months pregnant, and I get the call that I've been waiting for. I notice the name on the caller ID... I pick up.. they ask for me.... and I scream, "Is this about the SCOOTER!???" Sure enough.. my name has been drawn out of the 8,000 people, and now I am but 24 people away from my dream scooter. The final drawing is on Thursday - (for a good mental picture and giggle) please please please think of me, and my gigantic belly... winning THIS:

Say it ain't so!

2009-06-19T09:59:00.004-04:00

Gosh, I love winning things. Like the time when I found $1 under my tire while pumping gas.. I took that dollar and bought a lottery ticket (on the very first day that Tennessee started a Lottery, I might add) and I won fifty bucks. It was a wonderful investment. I think I then, instead of getting my usual $5 in gas - I actually filled her up! (this has not happened since then) I enjoy winning so much that most of the boardgames that we played while I was growing up were titled "Trina Wins", because of my slightly, no freakishly heightened competitive nature. Winning stuff rocks, which is why I was so udderly thrilled when I received THIS: (From Blogger-extraordinaire: Sunshine Meg) While I'm thrilled at the idea of blog awards.. I do think that they involve too many rules. Winning is fun. Rules - no fun. Oh well, I'll deal.
The rules consist of: "This award is bestowed on to blogs that are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

Wait, first of all - What does "self-aggrandizement" mean? It says that I'm not supposed to be interested in self-aggrandizement.... but am I? I have no idea. Good thing you don't have to have an insane vocabulary to win these things.

Anywhooo... the 8 people that will be blessed with being a "winner" for a day are:

1. Doodles of a journo - entertaining, smart - an all-around good person. I like that.

2. Trippin through life - reminds me of myself - which is great because well, I'm great.

3. Say Anything - I'm a new follower to this blog, but she makes me laugh already. Her pictures are great, and well, I don't think she has this award yet.. so ta-da!

4. Classy in Philadelphia - I just wanna BE her. (who is currently traveling through Europe)

Wow. I surrender at 4 blogs. I broke the rules - whatcha gonna do about it! Huh!?! Okay, but seriously though.. I just don't have the energy this morning to pass this along to 4 more people. My sleep patterns have been a little screwy this week - and well, I'm flippin exhausted and ready for the weekend with my boys.

It's time to comic-surf now. Be prepared for laughter.........

Best.Day.Ever.

2009-06-18T16:16:00.003-04:00

I've been blessed today with great foods. Seriously. At 7 months pregnant, food can be a total life-altering thing. This morning I hit up McDonald's for some biscuits w/ gravy. They loaded em' up. I basically licked the styrofoam plate until it disolved. Flippin awesome. Then, I was blessed 2 times with leftover spagetti and a Baby Ruth candybar. (I know, ew, together.. but separate... YUM-E) Then, a few hours later my boss showed up with an ice cream sundae smothered with chocolate syrup! Is it my birthday or something? No, it's BETTER. Guys, it gets better than that. We're going to my favorite place ever after work and eating Cuban Sandwiches. I guess I'll have to just stop by heaven on the way home from there.

Moving on... (while licking the icecream bowl DRY)...
I'm not sure if I mentioned it, but we have our crib now, and a beautiful matching changing table. The baby stuff is coming along nicely. If only my brain could grasp the concept of her somehow finding a way out of my belly. She's huge. To swap her out with a bowling ball would be pretty tolerable and consistent with what it feels like to carry her around in there. (looking back at that first paragraph, I'm pretty confident that she didn't grow that big all on her own) But still, she's huge.

Among all of the typical 700 worries and stresses inching their way around my thick skull... is the stress of my cat. What to do with my precious kitty cat? I thought that we could just keep her separated from the baby/the nursery/all things baby. But, even before the baby has gotten here, I have caught her lounging in the CRIB, car seat, stroller, and changing table MANY, MANY times. This is just NOT COOL. Scott thinks we should just put signs on everything letting her know that certain things are just OFF LIMITS. (like a picture of a cat, with a big X over it) But, I think she needs glasses first. Looks like her new home may be a permanant one outside among the moles that she kills and leaves on our sidewalk. She'll have to adjust to being an outside cat, and I'll have to adjust to her screaming at me to let her in so that she can sleep in the crib.

She'll be alright, won't she???

A Festival of Lights...

2009-06-15T11:03:00.007-04:00

Living so close to The Great Smoky Mountain National Park has a few nifty perks; such as the stunning mountainous views, the great local history, moonshine stills, and gorgeous winding rivers. But, no other perk compares to what we experienced last night. We left our house at about 5:30 pm... drove roughly an hour to the National Park, positioned the car in a puzzly-looking parking lot, and waited in line. We're not a very observant family, but did notice that the other 200 people in line had coolers, snacks, backpacks, chairs, blankets, flashlights, ect.. We, on the other hand, were only equipped with 3 half-empty bottles of warm water, sunglasses, and $3. ?? What did these people know that we weren't aware of? We hopped on the trolly at around 7:30? 8:00? (right about the time when starvation started to kick in for all of us) The trolly then drove us around and around, winding through the mountains for a good 10 minutes... and then.. plop! There we were. In the middle of nowhere.

We paid for this.

Why? Because we were going to see FIREFLIES! (Lightning bugs, or "flashlight bugs" as I heard a little boy call them) What? Why would you drive an hour, stand an hour, and then sit for 2 hours in the middle of nowhere to see something that you can see from your kitchen window??? Well, because these weren't just your average fireflies.. no these fireflies were smarter than your average firefly. They were SYNCHRONIZED. When it got really, really, insanely dark (and when we got really, really, really hungry).. we all gathered on a path in the middle of the mountains and saw the most spectacular display of lights that no Christmas-lights-fanatic could possibly compete with. It was stunning. This place, so close to our home, is one of only TWO known places in the World where this occurs (the other one is in East Asia somewhere). Scientists have no idea why these bugs decided to put on this show for us.. but they do it - the same time every year. Oh! And we also saw BLUE ones!!

Pretty cool, eh?

We probably didn't stay as long as we should have. (considering it had taken a total of 5 hours to actually see the first bug) But it was because we were unprepared (typical), and flippin starving. (also typical) So we packed up, hit the trolly, and headed to Arby's.

Please feed the animals!

2009-06-12T15:14:00.003-04:00

I work in a fish bowl.
4 walls - 3 of them are windows.
Numorous pairs of eyes staring into me for 8 hours a day.
Should I do something interesting for them??
Or is it interesting enough just watching me eat candy and spill stuff on my keyboard? Perhaps I should write a little blurb about myself and post it to the window.. like at the zoo. But instead of "Please do not feed the animals" it will say "she likes to eat cupcakes, and accepts donations". Seriously. I had one woman stare at me so hard that I went to check the mirror to make sure I wasn't sitting there with marker all over my face or something.

It's odd being a secretary.
Very odd.

People expect you to know things that you will never know. Like, "Do you know who called for me last monday, or well.. it might have been Friday?" or "How much does it cost to mail this?" (holding insanely large mysterious box) or "Do you know where we keep the (fill in blank)?" or my very very very favorite, "I'm supposed to meet with someone....(giving me blank stare, like I know who it is they're meeting with....)". I may be a genius. Heck ya, I am a genius. But, I have no Earthly idea why people think that I have the answers to all things "office". Is there some magic secretary out there???

I want to meet them.

Shower-queen

2009-06-09T16:36:00.006-04:00

I am a true survivor.
A warrior, if you will.

What have I conquered, you ask? - My very first baby shower. Done.

Racked up on some pretty sweet baby stuff, dozens of cupcakes, bbq, and chocolate-covered strawberries. YUMM! Oh! Annnndd, I didn't even have to play any of those ridiculous baby games! S-C-O-R-E! And, can I just say that I was mildly freaking out about having a baby shower? I'm not sure why. Maybe it's the attention, or the constant baby-advice being shoved in my ears, or the pink-fru-fruey stuff.. I'm not sure.. but there was a deep-down yucky feeling about it all beforehand. Sure, presents are great. Food is even better. But, I wouldn't want to do it again. Anyways, what's done is done. Thank you for spending what little money you have on me and Scott and our baby girl... one day I'll sit her down and make her write you all Thank-you notes. So - be looking out for those in 2019 or so.

Later Taters!

Mastering May

2009-06-02T14:56:00.004-04:00

Things I learned in May:

Getting married requires a lot of paperwork. I'm convinced that it's more paperwork than all of the following combined: applying for a job, filing taxes, buying a home, getting your passport, and having any sort of major surgery
No matter how much you DO NOT WANT a baby shower... you will enivitably have two of them thrown for you.
Facebook is the devil
It's better to be kicked by a three year old than to be spit on by one.
There's never a bad time to have a Yard Sale.
Take risks -Ask for things when you want them.
Babies can (and WILL) have hiccups while in the womb for DAYS on end - even more so when you're trying to get some shut-eye.
"Shut-eye" is a thing of the past
Pants that fit are a thing of the past

It's a bug-eat-bug World out there...

2009-05-29T13:20:00.007-04:00

Haven't seen much of SLICK today... Ya know, Slick, as in the L-I-Z-A-R-D that has made itself at home behind my computer at work. Yes, a friggin lizard. He's black and shiny and snake-like and creepy-fied and just downright GROSE. And now, missing.
Hey, here's an idea! Let me share with you the critters that have made nests in my office in the past year.

Exhibit A:

Meet Reece. Reece had lots of friends and enjoyed afternoon naps, gourmet chocolate, Christmas cookies, and chewing through cables. Reece passed away in the ceiling sometime in January. (the stench was ridiculous, but the rat poisoning did its' job)

Exhibit B:

Meet Un-named creepy bug #322. These sweet little runners are EVERYWHERE. You can hear them in the ceiling, or riffling through your stuff. One of em fell from the ceiling one day and landed on my keyboard while I was typing. I just about went into labor.

Exhibit C:
Meet Suzie. Suzie lived a long, healthy life behind the box of beanie babies for a good month or two. We never met any of Suzie's family, but we were pretty sure that she was not a loner. This is pretty much the actual size of Suzie, until she was splattered on the carpet with a steel-toed boot in late November 2008. Suzie was a freaky little crawly thing that will (not) be missed.

Exhibit D:

And last, but certainly not least, our (not so) good friend Slick. Slick is the newest edition to our lovely office. He enjoys catnapping behind my HP computer, long walks on the wall, freaking out unsuspecting employees, and sticking out his tounge. (he also effectively eats exhibits B and C, which is his ONLY endearing quality)

*Side note: my office is NOT located in a rainforest, farm, city, or swamp. No, these critters are good ol' Knoxville-Critters. Maybe I should change my job description from Child Advocate to Park Ranger?

I am woman....

2009-05-28T13:21:00.009-04:00

I started writing a blog entry today about how sucky it is to be a woman, and how easy it is to be a man. It was hateful and mean and completely hormone-driven. (Still, it was typed with more than a grain of truth... but it wasn't necessary) So, I stopped to reflect. Things seem hard right now. I am loved beyond measure, I have a beautiful little yellow house surrounded by tall green trees, I have a job that is (semi) rewarding, and I get to eat twice the amount of food because I'm pregnant with the most precious baby girl ever. Yet, I still feel pretty darn miserable today. Besides the actual physical pains of being pregnant; the terrible doctor's appointments, the extreme sleepiness, weird heartburn, tight pants, and awkward kicks from within... I am so drained emotionally. Everything is fine and dandy.. and then it hits me. Hits me hard. What the heck do I know about having babies!?! Where will she sleep? Will she sleep? Will I sleep? Will she be healthy? Will I know what to do if she's not healthy?! How do you change a diaper? How much do diapers cost?! Will we make enough money????? Truly, the questions go on and on and ON. Despite this being a month of ups and downs, money woes, sleepiness, doctor's visits and unplanned bathroom remodeling... it is still completely wonderful to be a woman. ESPECIALLY a woman who just married the most amazing trooper of all time. He gets to put up with my mood swings and my insomnia; my 75 wardrobe changes and my constant tardiness. (when I think of it that way, it sure does seem harder to be a man.. having to put up with ME) He doesn't provide answers to all of my 350,000 baby questions.. but he does provide love and security and the common sense to tell me that everything-will-be-okay.

I am woman. Hear me ROAARRR!

Everything. Will. Be. Okay.

It was about time...

2009-05-27T16:04:00.008-04:00

It had been quite a while since I'd spilled something.

That being said...
The streak is over.

It all started after my lunch break. Not sure why. Usually my clumsiness occurs in the wee hours of the morning.. while my brain is still in go-back-to-sleep-mode. But not today. Nope, today it definately had something to do with lunch. Maybe it was the odd combination of Raisin Bran and a turkey sandwich that heightened my typical clumsiness to an all new level. Maybe it had something to do with the 3 small children that I was supervising/child advocating/whatever you call my job. But, boy oh boy, did I have quite the spill. First, I stepped on a juice pouch... it squirted in an upward stream for about 10 seconds before I realized what I had done. (insert screaming child here) I had emptied his juice box. (a mortal sin, for those of you who aren't aware) Then, while running (well, walking...pregnant women don't run) to get some paper towels to wipe the grape juice off of the crying boys' face, I knocked over my water bottle. Not on the floor. Oh nooo.. it couldn't have just been on the floor, now could it??! No, it had to be where the outgoing mail gets stacked. That's right, folks. I soaked checks. I soaked receipts. I soaked thank-you notes. I soaked contracts. I soaked medical records. I soaked documents marked "CONFIDENTIAL" and documents marked "IMPORTANT". There was no discriminating. No envelope was safe from the wrath of H2O. Remember, the boy is still screaming in the next room... so I put the soggy envelopes on hold and came to the rescue with my slightly dampened paper towels only to find that the boy has now wet his pants.

Classic.

Caroline Herring

2009-05-22T09:03:00.000-04:00

Do yourselves a favor a take a listen...

2009-05-21T13:49:00.005-04:00

I'm at the office all by my lonesome today. BUT, don't you dare feel sorry for me. No sir. I've turned my office into little bungalow, if you will, a home-away-from-home... Cranked up the easy listening, lit a few candles, used our printer to print 30 posters for my babe's upcoming gig... let's see... played some Playstation, touched up the makeup... envied my coworkers and their 700 hours of paid-time-off, desperately tried to find something vaguely interesting on the internets... stared, longingly, into the green, green trees that await me...

I wanna go home now.

I can PEE once more!

2009-05-20T16:12:00.009-04:00

I'm nearly positive that I've made all you bloggy-buddies pukey for the past few posts - feeding you lovey-dovey, ooshy-gooshy stuff about how I'm so happy and in love.. so I'll give you a break. But, you should also consider giving ME a break because I'm a newlywed....
So, in other news...
My husband is fabulous.
Wait. Just kidding. (I'm hilarious)
OUR BATHROOM IS FINISHED!!
COMPLETE.
DONE.
I don't have to treck to the ends of the Earth (the basement) to pee! I don't have to smell that grose basement smell when I get out of the "shower" (if you can call it that). Oh! I don't have to wear my flip-flops in the shower! I mean, really, I'm six months pregnant over here. There's no need to make a drowsy, grumpy, clumsy, about-to-wet-myself-6-month-pregnant-chick hike downstairs at 3 in the morning only to find a make-shift port-a-pottie surrounded by sawdust and mud puddles.

Can I just say that I am ubber-relieved that our bathroom is back to normal?! AND.. (bonus feature) it's BEAUTIFUL!! I'll post some pictures of our sparkly new restroom in comparison to the scary basement one... we'll see which one you'd prefer.

Oh yeah, and my husband is amazing.

A love note....

2009-05-20T14:13:00.003-04:00

A note from my husband regarding the poster that I made for his upcoming show:

It's Great! I love it, have I told you how awesome you are today? Thank you so much darlin for deciding to live a crazy life with me. We're gonna have lots of adventures, I can tell.
I love you more and in higher dollar amounts than any forseeable future Bail Out packages. Yes, that much.

I. Love. Him.

One lovely hippie wedding...

2009-05-20T08:32:00.012-04:00

Gorgeous man alert!

2009-05-15T13:46:00.009-04:00

An ode to all things gorgeous. (or, well, to my husband)
Husband, you officially rock. My rock-dar is off the scale... You rock because:

You're hot. I mean, smokin hot. Even when you're covered in sawdust, paint thinner, and sticky sweat.. you're damn gorgeous.
You got the coolest gig ever - opening for Mr. Darrell Scott himself. (Singer-songwriter extraordinare!) I'm such a proud wife that I've even been playing your sappy love songs all day in preparation for the event! (that's devotion, baby)

You also rock because you love me.
And because you're hot.
Oh! And because you're fixing our bathroom. (That upgrades your "rock" status to Rock STAR status)

I love you, Darlin.

It's not my Birthday, but I'll take the gifts...

2009-05-15T12:51:00.013-04:00

Sweet Mother of Pearl, I got an award! While I realize that I am completely awesome and hilarious AND lovely... I am also still very modest, and was pleasantly surprised to receive this award. It's like my little diary got a "Well Done!" sticker and a big smiley face. (usually, I prefer cupcakes and presents..LOTS of presents.. but a sticker will have to do for now)
Thank you, My Wooden Heart (awesome blogger buddy with amazingly-long-lasting-relationship-skills and rockin polaroids), for thinking of me!

Like all things Bloggy, there are rules. And they are as such:

The Rules:1) Accept the award, post it on your blog together with the name of the person who has granted the award, and his or her blog link.2) Pass the award to 15 other blogs that you’ve newly discovered. Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award.} Sounds easy enough, eh?

Firstly, (mainly because I like saying Firstly) I'm gonna break the rules in attempt to save some of my blogger buddies from receiving the same award twice.. and I'm only gonna pick 5. I think this is more of a practical number, anyways. (and because rules were totally made to be broken, and because I'm pregnant - I do what I want)

I'm a new follower to all five of these blogs.. and they are all flippin hillarious. Please show them bloggy love and give em a little clicky.

Peace

We're all a little starved...

2009-05-15T10:51:00.004-04:00

Feed the Hungry with this cool idea from Kraft. All you have to do is click HERE, and they will send a box of mac and cheese to Feeding America (formerly named America's Second Harvest) FOR FREE!! (I'm all about feeding the hungry, because heck - I'm always hungry) Plus they have some pretty sweet coupons available online too!

Remember, CLICK HERE folks!
That's all the good works from me today.
Ciao!

Pick a shirt, any shirt!

2009-05-14T12:53:00.002-04:00

I am a master of disguise.

A regular shape-shifter, if you will.

Yes, I'm talking about my unexplained need to change clothes four times a day. I can't quite figure out where it all started. But, it has gotten slightly ridiculous. I might not change my ENTIRE wardrobe, per say.. just an item here, and item there. Black flip-flops to brown ones, khaki pants to blue jeans, blue shirt to LIGHTER colored blue shirt... get my drift? Occasionally, yes, the entire outfit must go. Take today, for instance...

Went home on my lunch break wearing:

Khaki pants

Royal blue lacy shirt

brown flip-flops

Came back to work one hour later wearing:

Same Khaki pants

Blue/white floral hippie shirt

BLACK flip-flops

I'm sure some of you can understand doing this on say... a weekend... ? Ya know, when you're lounging around the house and who cares how many times you change shirts?? But, I do it on a typical work day. I often get questions like, "were you wearing that when you left?", or "I thought you had on blue jeans?" Some days I think that I do it just to see if anyone notices. Perhaps one day I'll stumble into the office after my lunch break wearing a Superman cape and some fuzzy bunny slippers... hmmm...

Do I need therapy?

(don't answer that)

(no, wait.. please do answer that)

Busy Busy Bumble Bee

2009-05-12T15:43:00.010-04:00

Today's Achievements:

Lost Online Scrabble to Scott. (twice)
Learned from the Online Scrabble that "Yar" is a word. (the meaning of the word "Yar" is yet to be determined)
Discovered Beef Chimichangas. (this is a lifetime achievement if I do say so myself)
Wore my very first pair of maternity pants.
Felt stupid for not buying maternity pants sooner.
Wrote thank you cards to all of our wedding attendees. (slapped myself for not buying more forever stamps a few days back. Remember when I had a surplus of stamps??)
Convinced Boss Lady to let us leave 45 minutes early. (Because I'm THAT good)
Rescued my favorite unicorn beanie-baby from the clutch of a drooly 1 year old. (Hey! It wasn't suitable for babies anyways. I give toys to kids all the time. Okay?! Just not my Mystic!)
Cleaned out my wallet and found 17 bucks worth of credit at a department store. (WOOT! Can somebody say.... baby stuff??? Or shoes. I like shoes.)
Planned for our weekend getaway to Charleston. (Oh, the shenanigans!!!! No, wait, pregnant women can't partake in shenanigans. It will be relaxing. Yeah. Relaxing....)
Planned for my hour-long shower. (the bathroom is nearly finished!! As in, I could possibly be showering in it TONIGHT. So, don't call for a while, kay? And forgive me for the past few weeks of "roughing it")
Moaned about rising gas prices
Got kicked in the ribs for the first time! (not as exciting as I had anticipated, and not recommended in any way, shape, or form)
Researched prenatal classes given at the hospital.
Cursed when I found out how much prenatal classes at the hospital cost. (Seriously, I'm not made of money... because my bathroom is)
Retreated to the house...

Later Taters!

2009-05-12T11:13:00.002-04:00

It makes sense to ME!!!

2009-05-12T10:01:00.009-04:00

Common sense.
Anybody out there with any extra?
Could I borrow some to give out to Tennessee?
Good grief, people. If you have a doubt in your brain that a child is being abused... more than likely, it's happening. So.. you think something has happened to Billy.. what next? What are the steps? Call the doctor? NO, not necessarily. Your primary physician is not capable of handling child abuse cases. (neither physical nor sexual abuse) Call the perpetrator?? Absolutely not. UNLESS, you want all evidence to be destroyed and a missing perpetrator headed to Mexico. Call all of your family? Probably not a good idea either. It is important that the child not be asked over and over and over again about what happened - Just as adults don't like to relive uncomfortable and sometimes painful memories. Take the kid to a hospital? Woah! Ding ding ding! If the incident has happened within 72 hours, more than likely there is still some valid physical evidence that a forensic medical doctor can salvage for prosecution. If it has happened, say, 3 weeks ago... call the Department of Children's Services/or the Police. Please, please, please believe your children/your neighbors children/your brothers' children/your students/your cousins. There were over 1,000 cases reported in my county alone last year.. and these were just the reported cases. I, myself, have probably convinced 400 people to call the police and report abuse. These are the people that call our office on a daily basis to ask me if "fill in blank" should be reported or not. The answer is almost always "YES!" So, to sum up my rant... if there is suspicion that something has happened to a child, then it probably has. AND, by not reporting it.. you could be held legally responsible for NOT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT. If you know a child in this situation and need assistance, please do not hesitate to ask me. Please. It happens every single day. Every. Day.
(Perhaps you can tell that I just spent an hour on the phone with a woman who's son was CLEARLY being sexually abused by his Uncle? I spent that hour trying to convince the woman that she needed to call 9-1-1, until finally I did it myself.) Ughh.

And, now.. I promise to write a more cheery blog later today. I feel better.
Love and Happiness,
Trina

Nerddom

2009-05-11T15:22:00.010-04:00

Things that could potentially classify me as a DWEEB:

The fact that I play Scrabble on a weekly basis with Hubby. (used to be daily.. but I'm trying to cut back on my nerd-dom. (f.y.i- Nerddom is not a Scrabble-worthy word. But, QI most definately is) Sometimes we even play against eachother ONLINE while I'm at work. (we are crafty nerds)
Star Trek was the best movie ever. For all time. I would proudly be called a Trekie anyday, because of how great that movie was. (if that doesn't SCREAM Dweeb, I don't know what does)
My most prized wedding gift was a Brita Water Dispenser. (we are bff's)
I am obsessed with Finding Nemo on the Playstation at work. The kids want to shut it off, and I whine like a baby until they let me beat level 4. (Woah. That was embarassing to type)
Given the choice between normal bandaids and Disney bandaids, I almost always go for the Disney.. even if they are toddler-sized and offer no protection against infection. (Gotta love that Minnie Mouse)
In preparation of the 2 cent increase of postage stamps- I went above and beyond and used our postage machine at work to stamp a few dozen envelopes with 42 cent stamps on Friday prior to today's price increase.. thinking that this would save our office a few bucks. (how thoughtful of me, right??) Wrong. It never dawned on me that those envelopes would be worthless as of today, until the 2 cents was added. :*( Oh well, I tried. Anybody need a dozen pre-paid envelopes??
I am a New York Jets Fan.
I love Roger Miller:

Need I say more?

Philosophical Phriday Update

2009-05-08T15:54:00.003-04:00

I'm done with the blog-remodeling. For now. This background brings me peace, tranquility, and a smidge of girly-ness. The previous background just gave me girly-nausea. Toomuchpinksyndrome. I feel better now. Don't you?

Oh, and the office has slowly crept back to normalcy. (If by normal I mean: children falling off of scooters, wetting their pants, sticking play-doh up their noses, bite marks, drink-spilling, crying, eating plastic hotdogs, drawings of private parts, 4 year olds cussing their mothers out, more crying, rare adorable giggling, and 47,000 HotWheels cars scattered across my floor. Yeah, this is the normalcy that I was hoping to get back to) If perhaps none of this sounds interesting to you, Child Advocacy may not be in your future.

It's 4:30 and I'm cuttin out early, folks. Can you blame me? Seriously?
Love and happiness,
Trina

Philosophical Phriday Phun

2009-05-08T09:33:00.015-04:00

Things about Friday that make me go HHMM....

Today marks our ONE WEEK WEDDING ANNIVERSARY! (is that too obsessive? - Could be.) This time last week I was frantic and packing, loading up the vehicles to go pick up my sissy at the airport. So far, marriage is a piece of cake. (Mmm.. Chocolate cake)
There was somethin' fiesty in my eye this morning. Something sharp.. perhaps a razor blade with a splash of lemon juice? Ouchies. I'm thankful that we have a Doctor on staff who can soothe away my aches and pains, flip my eyelid upsidedown, and then tell me that I'm not allowed to replenish my makeup on that eye. (Wait, WHAT? No makeup!? We'll see about that)
Boss Lady has the flu today (could it be the swine flu?? Stay tuned to find out...), #1 favorite coworker's house was broken into last night, and #1 least favorite coworker came in an hour late crying her eyes out. For the first time in a long time, I felt sad for her. She needed a hug. I probably would have offered one, but I too had tears streaming down my face from the sporatic eye pain. Boss Man quickly retreated to his vehicle during all of the commotion. (clearly, he's not one for sticking around in times of crisis) Our office fell apart at approximately 10:23 a.m. It is slowly recovering.
At 10:45 a.m., despite Doctor's orders, I replenished the mascara to my right eye. (who does she think she is, making that sort of demand?!)
Today marks the day that my belly has officially reached epic proportions. It is large. It is round. It is solid, like a stone. (rock hard abs, baby. Rock. Hard. Abs.) It touches stuff before the rest of me touches stuff... like when I'm leaning on a fence, for instance, the belly touches the fence first. It cannot be camouflaged anymore. People are suddenly nicer to me than before. They let me cut in line at the grocery store, open doors for me, pull out chairs, bring me sweets, and tell me that I look fabulous. (which is absolute truth) It's really quite wonderful to be pregnant.
I hearby claim today, Friday, May 8th, 2009, the day of the Butterfinger. (no, there is no possible way that this could correlate with the previous bullet about my belly growth. Nuh-huh. Not. Possible. No way.)

Trina OUT, bloggies! Happy Friday!

Sneakytreats

2009-05-07T21:43:00.002-04:00

Hehehe..
I just snuck to the refrigerator for a bowl of Rice-a-roni, chicken, brocolli, and cheese... strawberries, and then snuck in a spoonful of Cookies & Cream Icecream while the boys weren't looking. Can we say: Pregnancy cravings?? I just had to write that down somewhere so that when I'm looking back on this blog after my pregnancy, I can remember the oddities of food that I consumed. I won't go into detail about how I probably gained four pounds TODAY alone... but let's just say Butterfingers are my weakness. I'm curious now... what foods do YOU sneak out of the fridge or cupboard when there's nobody around?? Please tell me so that I feel less freaky. Thanks. :)
Nite Blogsters!

Where's my hard-hat, people???!

2009-05-07T12:38:00.005-04:00

Have I told you how much I'm OVER construction zones in my house? Well, I'm over it people. OVER IT. Our teenie tiny little bitty bathroom remodeling "project" has turned into "Operation-Destroy-Trina's-Living-Space". Now, granted, it may be totally worth it just to see the lime green/peach tiles removed, and our sparkly new bathtub... but we'll see. Sure, I love waking up at 3 am with the urge to wet the bed because our little bundle of joy has decided that my bladder makes the perfect trampolene. (That's my favorite) Now, top it off with... finding my shoes so that I can make the treck to the creepy-crawly basement, watching out for nails and screws and potential-splinters... just to plop myself on the potty only to pee a thimble size amount of pee, and find an empty roll of toilet paper and a mosquito with legs the size of my hand. All while looking straight up into our REAL bathroom that has been destroyed. Sounds like fun, huh?
You don't know the half of it.

Showers.
Those are fun. Fun, as in.. I'd rather bathe in the middle of Times Square with a bucket of Windex and a brillo pad. The shower in the basement is approximately the size of a typical kitchen pantry. Probably smaller. Every time I get in the thing, it's dirtier than the time before. How is this possible??? The floor has a crack in it, which leaks under my drumset in the room next door... the ceiling is made up of cobwebs and icky stuff (and is only 4 inches from your head), and the shower curtain refuses to stay where put. Oh.. and it's dark.
Very dark. Perhaps it's even BETTER that it's dark.. so that I can't really see what else is going on in their with me.
Please give me back my bathroom.
Please.
Please.
Please.

Please?
Oh, and can I just say... Thank You, honey, for all of the hard work that you've put into our soon-to-be-lovely new bathroom. Finishing this bathroom will be ALMOST as exciting as marrying you. (is that bad?) Oh.. and I also want to PRE-appologize for what our water bill will amount to after I take 4 showers a day in our new shower.. admiring our pretty new tile. We'll just have to cut back on electricity next month. Heck, I'll even shower in the dark just to save a few pennies!
Love you, hubby!
Hate you, bathroom! :)

Cheers!

Watch out, Look out, married woman comin through..

2009-05-05T12:39:00.003-04:00

So, our wedding day was fabulous. Couldn't have asked for more. I COULD, however, have asked for LESS rain.. but we definately made the best of it. We planned and planned and planned our little tooshies off. Nothing went as expected. (We somehow did not plan for 36 hours of rain) Regardless of the weather...at approximately 8:00 on Friday evening, we marched down an "aisle" of mud (me being barefoot, I might add) (hey, I'm pregnant, I do what I want), with our friends and family humming the wedding march in the drizzling rain. The only other thing I remember about that moment was how handsome my hubby was, and how proud I was to have picked the right one. (and that I was standing on a pebble.. but that's beside the point)

Overall, I feel like we have a fairytale kind of love. It wasn't love at first sight. It wasn't like a bolt of lightning. It was a sincere, loving friendship from the beginning. We wanted nothing more than to be there for eachother. He is the only man (besides my dad) who understands me enough to know my faults and to not care about them. He knows that I am not a morning person (ever), and that I fall asleep in every single movie ever made (regardless of how action-packed and loud it is). He puts up with my cat (just barely enough), and opens my car door for me over and over and over and over and over again. He eats junk food in bed with me regularly. He lets me wear his blue jeans when none of mine fit anymore (boooo to pregnancy). He talks to our baby girl while she floats around in my belly, and congratulates me when the doctor tells me I've gained 6 pounds (thanks, but no thanks, darlin), and MOST importantly... He kills all of the bugs in the house. (It's okay that you're jealous. Who wouldn't be?) Eek. Vanity.

Point being is that I am so excited to be married to this man. I feel like I somehow tricked him.. maybe hypnotized him?
I am far too lucky to be his wife. Thank you for all the well-wishes! Everything was perfect.

A Sneak-Peek....

2009-05-05T09:59:00.000-04:00

How to Get Hitched By:Trina

2009-04-30T09:05:00.005-04:00

As most of you know, I'm getting married soon. Well, actually.. TOMORROW. What most of you do NOT know, however, is how much of a procrastinator I am. So much, in fact, that I still am not quite settled on my dress. I know many women that would panic and cry and break stuff if this were the case for them.. but not me. Nope. I am A-O.K.
Since I haven't blogged in a while, I thought I'd give you an update on all of the things that I have/have not done to prepare for our wedding extravaganza. Here goes:

How to Get Hitched

By: Mwwwaa

First, and most importantly, you find your soon-to-be spouse. It wasn't too difficult for me, since he conveniently moved upstairs in my apartment "complex" (if you can call it that). You wine and dine eachother over milkshakes and chicken bones, paint bathrooms together, make extremely long trips to Wal-mart together.. and vwwaa-laaa.. true love ensues.
Second, you move in together. Yah, some people wait til after marriage.. but I think that's a scam. Moving in together was the smartest and most efficient thing that we've done so far. (I might note that moving into a house with central air/heat, storm windows, and sturdy walls are pretty important.. and not to be over-looked. --PLEASE, take my word for it)
Next comes baby. Hooray! Hooray! We've cloned ourselves!! Parties, celebration, presents, weight gain, insomnia, back aches. Woah! Hold the phone! We gotta get hitched!
So, now you see how easy it is to get married. Just 4 simple steps!! All for just $19.99 plus s/h. (you guys get the summary version for free just because I love you)

Now, for the bonus feature!!

Things you should probably already have on the day before your wedding:

Wedding dress
Groom's pants
Plans for your hair
Eating utensils
Money to pay everyone that you promised you'd pay
A bathroom at your house to get ready in
A good relationship with Mother Nature
Appropriate shoes
Arrangements to pick up food/cake/flowers
Money to pay everyone that you promised you'd pay
Wedding dress

Now do you believe me that I am the World's #1 procrastinator??! Well, it's a toss-up between Scott and I. You be the judge.

Please, please, please pray for us that our higher power has it all under control. There is NO WAY to do it on our own. Oh! And next time I blog, I'll be a married woman. (Sorry gents)

Peace!

Smoking mama

2009-04-23T09:51:00.002-04:00

Somebody hold me back before I jump this woman.
Please.
Or not. Just, lemme at her!
What woman, you ask??
The one that's 8 months pregnant and smoking her 2nd cigarette in 10 minutes.
Yah. That one.
The same woman that told me that she's having a girl, and doesn't want a girl.
Really? Is that why you're trying to kill it with nicotine????????????

This is really upsetting me. And it's completely legal.

You suck! Wait, no, You ROCK!

2009-04-22T09:13:00.004-04:00

My office officially sucks and rocks at the same time. The sucky news: every single fundraiser that they put on is totally not pregnant-friendly. Such as:
1st fundraiser: OYSTERfest. O-Y-S-T-E-R-S. And alcohol. And oysters. (mmm.. I love me some oysters, but the "doctor" says they're a no-go)
2nd fundraiser: Rollerskating. Sweet, sweet idea people. But, where's the pregnancy-love, eh?? Sure, it's a blast to watch all of my favorite co-workers go around and around and around and fall on their tooshies 1700 times.. but it's just not as fun as ME falling 1700 times!
3rd fundraiser: (Well, this one COULD be pregnancy-friendly... but it's not $$-friendly) It's some sort of swanky 85 course dinner. I couldn't afford to sneeze in one of the napkins, so I just stay far far far away.

The news that rocks:
They love me. They really really love me. Not only did I receive the most beautiful bouquet of flowers for "Administrative Assistant Day", I also get donuts and cupcakes on a regular basis. Well, they're for the "entire office" or something like that.. but they somehow all end up in my belly. ANDDDD.. In preparation for Earth Day, we officially started a recycling program last week!! (because of mwwwaaaaa.. thankyouverymuch!)

Hey, maybe this working thing isn't so bad afterall.

2009-04-21T13:18:00.001-04:00

Sweet buttery biscuits, It's TUESDAY!

2009-04-21T12:45:00.002-04:00

I felt like a kid again this weekend. Could it be, perhaps, that I am part-kid right now? With one living in my abdomen? ORRR.. could it be the shenanigans that we pulled for 3 days straight? That's right people, THREE DAYS IN A ROW. Three days of me staying up past 10 o'clock! Three days of doing things that pregnant women shouldn't necessarily do. Three days of listening to me complain about staying up past 10 o'clock! Three days of "oh, hell ya this is fun"! Three days of "is it over yet?" Three days of "what are we doing here??!!!" Three days of... well.. I'll explain:
The antics consisted of: late late late night movie (oh no, it gets worse) (and yes, I managed to stay awake for ALMOST the entire thing), bouncing on bouncy slides (It's all fun and games til the pregnant chick gets elbowed in the belly region), the ferris wheel of DEATH (note the DEATH part), the water slide (or the slide-winder?? Either way, it was fast, watery, zippity, fast, and wet. And fast. And also involved a 26 mile hike uphill, in the snow, barefeet, carrying a cow.... somehow. (and I can rhyme in no time) And it was fast.), water guns, and (because we went to the amusement park) 40 dollar chicken tenders.
I.Love.My.Life.

The best day of my life

2009-04-17T13:18:00.005-04:00

Ohmygoodness ohmygoodness ohmygoodness!!!! AAAHH! I just got my very first-est ever-est blogger award. I'm not really sure how this thing works. I'm ashamed to say it, but I'm a blogger-award-virgin. (yes, I know I'm pregnant and the word "virgin" should not necessarily be associated with me.. but you get the pic) Thank you, thank you, and more thank you's to Little Miss Michelle, who rocks in more ways than this one. (like the fact that she's from the Southeast AND she has gobs more friends than I do and, and, and...) Well, we're sort of "new" bff's.. but I'm pretty sure she's awesome.

Anywho..

Part of this rockin award (besides me feeling the need to wear some $10,000 dress and make an acceptance speech in front of my other bff's like: Morgan Freeman, Robin Williams, Ashley Judd... ect) is to list five of my guiltiest pleasures. I have lots of them, so narrowing it down to five should be okay. (keep in mind that I'm pregnant, and typically the only thing on my mind is food)

1. Chocolate-chip-cookie-dough ICECREAM.. but not just ANY ol' C.C.C.D Icecream! BEN & JERRY'S C.C.C.D Icecream! (ya know, 4 dollars a spoonful?? - guilty pleasures are not cheap, yo)

2. Soduku (I know. Say no more.)

3. Deli-meat samples at the grocery store (mmmm... salami....)

4. Pixar movies

5. Bubble baths

Woah. I feel guilty just typing those.

*note to Little Miss Michelle - No, you cannot retract my award because of my extreme dweebiness. The damage is already done.

My next task in receiving this award is to spread the joy and pass my award onto MY favorite blogger buddies. Easy enough. (in no particular order, because they are all equally fabulous)

1. Miss. Sassy from Well Okay, Sassy Britches! could get this award just because of her kick a** blog title.. but she also gets it because she's witty and charming and well, actually READS my blog.

2. This one might also qualify as one of my guiltiest pleasures... The High-Heel Diaries are juicy and dirty, hilarious and inteligent. If you're not her friend, YOU SHOULD BE!! (that's a threat. Sort of)

3. SnoopyLloyd makes my list. And NOT just because she looks like me, swears like me, and has the same dad as me. I truely love her sense of humor.

4. Sawdust and Cowpies. Need I say more?

5. Because she says the things that we all want to say - TovaDarling, here's to that nasty comment from a certain "someone". I think you rock.

Phew. I'm pooped now.

Later Taters!

Stamp Surplus

2009-04-15T14:33:00.003-04:00

Soo...
I bought way too many stamps for our wedding invitations. They were not cheap. That was 18 bucks that I could have spent on many other important wedding-y thingies. So, I'm selling them on the black market. Seriously. Everyone at my office needs a stamp today. (because everyone at my office SOMEHOW procrastinated longer than I did, and is sending their tax stuff today. - I know.. I'm just as shocked as you are. It's like a big huge emergency, and I'm the big huge savior) Or so they thought. 42 cent stamps have now been taxed by Mwwwaaa and are ATLEAST 50 cents. (55 cents if you're on my "list") I mean, these things are one hot commodity right now! 50 cents is a STEAL! PLUS.. they're Forever Stamps! You just can't beat this deal. (insert maniacal laugh here) Eight stamps left, people!! Get em' while they're hot!

2009-04-14T13:29:00.003-04:00

Slugs are grose.
Yellow slugs are grose-er. (I know this because they have infested the sidewalks around my office) I sort of feel like a slug today. Not as slimy and disgusting.. but definately slow and vegetable-like... leaving a trail of crap behind me for others to clean up. PLEASE clean up after me!!! Our fundraiser at work is royally kicking my arse. Whoever's idea it was to give ALL of the ticket and table sales to ME was obviously smoking something fishy. I mean, really, I can't remember ANYTHING lately. Pregnancy memory loss has kicked in, right according to protocol. Here is a typical conversation between myself and potential fundraiser attendee:
Attendee: "Yes. I'd like to purchase two tickets to the upcoming fundraiser. How much are the tickets?"
Me: "What tickets?"
Attendee: "The fundraiser tickets"
Me: "What about them?"
Attendee: "How much ARE THEY???"
Me: "Oh.. Why didn't you just ask? They're $75 each."
Attendee: "Okay.. and what does that include?"
Me: "Include?"
Attendee: "This IS where I buy the tickets right?"

I've lost my marbles and turned into a grose, yellow slug.
Brain damage + Reese's cups + 1,000 phone calls = Yellow slug from the sidewalk. (a.k.a - Trina)

The genetics of things...

2009-04-13T13:39:00.005-04:00

I cannot wear white. I would love to, and occasionally do TRY to.. but it's just not a good idea. I will inevitably decide to cook spagetti or eat wings or chocolate ice cream or roll down a grassy hill on just the day that I decide to wear white. (because I'm cool like that) Wait, let me specify.. this rule generally goes for all things light-colored such as: Khaki, tan, cream, or ivory. I've tried everything from soda water to warm water to salt water to bleach pens to wet-wipes to soap and water to lemon water to you-name-it. Me and white clothing are just not as tight as me and darker colored clothing.
Thinking about this, and other idiosyncracies of mine, makes me somewhat sad for the little bundle of joy that I'm carrying in my belly. This poor child will probably never wear white, or never be very good at figuring out percentages. She will probably always ask the same question three times in a row, or interrupt people at the very worst times. She will probably be a foot taller than all of the other kids for a VERY long time, and have mammoth-sized feet for E-T-E-R-N-I-T-Y. She will most likely have Scott's oversized (but very adorable, honey) head, and will have one hick-up an hour for weeks at a time. This tiny little baby will one day start a fight just because (because that's what women do), and will probably start a fire in the back yard with the leaf blower. (because Dad will inevitably teach her this. I'm sure of it. Fact.) Ohmygoodness. What have I done? This baby will be a mini-us. Poor thing. I'm resting, though, on my belief that she will be 700 times better than I think that she'll be. She will be beautiful and clumsy and talented and forgetful and absolutely 100% loved. (with stains and all)

2009-04-08T16:50:00.001-04:00

2009-04-08T16:42:00.000-04:00

2009-04-08T16:24:00.002-04:00

Scratch that post below.
I hate my clock.
"TICK TOCK" - Hello! I'm the loudest clock ever made! Did anyone ever watch the Peter Pan movie called HOOK?? Ya know the one with Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman? If you've seen it, then you know where I'm going with this. The CLOCKS. With their annoying loud ticking and clicking and ringing and beeping and cooing and dinging! I think Captain Hook twitches or something everytime a clock ticks. Yah, well I totally get it now. I wish one of MY hands was a HOOK so that I could smash the crap out of my clock at work.

Wow. This blog really took a turn for the worse in a matter of 15 minutes. Read below to fully understand.

Eek. I still love you 4:15, but 4:30 better watch out.

I love my clock

2009-04-08T16:15:00.004-04:00

Dear 4:15,
I love you. I know that I've told you this before.. but dang it, I'm telling you once more. You are my favorite time of the day, but ONLY when you're P.M. (You were truly my enemy this morning at 4:15 a.m, when I awoke to find you flashing at me with your typical neon glow, taunting me. But, that's beside the point)

But, not you Mr. 4:15 pm. You are my friend. I love you because you get me out of work in approximately 45 minutes. I love you because you're that much closer to dinner. (and we all know how much a pregnant chick likes her dinner)
There's not many more reasons than those two right there. But, they truly are the best reasons.

Love, love and more love,

Baby NEWS!

2009-04-07T10:21:00.004-04:00

That's right, folks.. We're having a girl. (which saves me from returning the dozen or so little dresses that I've purchased since December) (maybe I had a hunch???.. just maybe?) Actually, not true. I would have bet my shiney new wedding ring that it was a boy, but I just couldn't resist those adorable dresses.
We were so excited after we found out that I decided to take the rest of the day off of work to celebrate. Our celebrations included: stopping by the County Clerk's office for our Marriage License (uh-oh.. we are now "licensed to wed"), purchasing our yummy chocolate wedding cake, eating the absolute best cuban food known to man, taking a much needed 3:00 nap (cuban food apparently makes me sleepy), and watching our baby's first major motion picture. - The doctor hooked us up with a dvd of the ultrasound, and in some pictures you can actually see the facial features. Technology-blows-my-mind.

By the way, Little Miss. Peanut is now 21 weeks old. And huge. There's not as much room in there as I'd thought. She actually looks quite squashed. She weighs ONE WHOLE POUND now and is, from head-to-toe, 10 inches long. I love her already.. tall like her mama.

(This has nothing to do with baby)
IT'S SNOWING! What is wrong with you, Tennessee???? Sunday it was 75 degrees outside - a perfect Spring day. Two days later and we can make snowmen? What will tomorrow bring? YOU ARE CONFUSING MY PLANTS!

Hello strange blog world.

2009-04-03T15:15:00.004-04:00

Eek! I just remembered that I HAVE A BLOG!! Yes, ME! And, woah.. HERE IT IS!! Where in the WORLD have I been????? I'm sorry, oh blog world, that I've neglected you for the past week or so.. Life's just not fair.
Talk about being BUSY, though! Life has hit me pretty hard lately. So many new things that I just get swept up in it all. First, my belly is huge. And hard... like rock-hard abs.. but all over. And rounded. And it moves from time to time. Pretty sweet. Second, I'm getting married in less than ONE MONTH. Woah. I just processed that. Rings, Cake, food, legalities, family, friends, weather?, partying, Husband, Wife. Oh my. Third, my job is CRAZY busy with abused kids. Something about the economy being crappy really has a gigantic effect on the way parents treat their children. STOP IT PEOPLE!!! ANDDDD.. our biggest fundraiser of the year is approaching in two weeks.. and YowzerZ!! The phone WILL NOT STOP RINGING long enough for me to type a blog. *except for today, because I have conveniently sent all calls to voicemail for a much-needed break from all the ruckus. (If you tell anyone.. you are no longer my blogger-buddy. Officially.)

Enough about me though.

No, wait, I'm not done with me.

I just realized that this entire blog post is slightly exaggerated. Because, although I HAVE been super-dooper-crazy busy.. I have still found time to finish an entire Soduku book and start a new one this week. (while at work) AND, I spent an hour doing "research" on wedding dresses for women with large bellies. NOT PLUS SIZE.. but MATERNITY. There IS a difference. Right?????
Oh yeah, and Forthly, (yes, I just said Forthly) we are re-modeling our bathroom this month. (Thank you, 1970's, for our peach/lime green tile walls.. but NO THANKS) Oh! And we've spent many a night slaughtering ants that have infested our mailbox. (that's an entirely different blog post yet to be written) But, the ants are quite smart and have decided to hitch a ride INSIDE the house on our junk mail. Ants = 1, Trina = ZERO. Grrr. (It's soooo ON though) You don't mess with a pregnant chick and her chocolate cake. YOU-JUST-DON'T-DO-IT. And, (just cause I want to say Fifthly)... FIFTHLY, we get to find out the sex of the baby on MONDAY!!!! Mark your calendars, Folks.. and cast your ballots in my comments!

Later Taters!

2009-03-26T16:28:00.004-04:00

Things I'm thankful for today:
1. I'm thankful that I'm not a praying mantis. Apparently, the praying mantis bites his mate's head off while he impregnates her. Why?

2. I'm thankful that I'm not an elephant. (even though I feel like one) Because elephants carry their pregnancies for TWO YEARS!!! And then.. they have to give birth to: AN ELEPHANT!

Long-lost Letters...

2009-03-26T13:05:00.004-04:00

Dear Chick-fil-A,
I love you. I probably shouldn't, but I do. I worked at you for 4 years. It was a Love-Hate relationship.. but ever since I quit working there, it's more of a Love-Love relationship. You are delicious. I mean, really. YUM-EE.

Dear Unborn Baby,
You've kept me awake now.. every night this week. What's the matter? I give you all the food you could possibly want.. so I know that you're not hungry. You've made it so that even when I DO sleep, I have bizarre dreams like that you are born with a full mustache, or that I'm feeding you B.L.T's when you're an infant. What's up with that? Even when I try to knock us both out with Tylonol P.M- You insist on the jabbing and poking. Are you trying to tell me something? Like: "make Dad stop snoring, please!" or "Go ahead - Steal those covers, Mom". Or are you just preparing me for the next 18 years of sleeplessness?
Love,
(mom)

Dear Mind,
Where have you gone? I keep misplacing you. Like today, when I tore apart my office to find a check that you put somewhere. Where did you put it??!! Two hours later, and you found it... right where it was supposed to be. Why didn't you look there in the first place? Why are you clumsier than usual? I stopped feeding you nicotine and booze.. and THIS is the thanks I get???! I'm losing you. Please come back to me.

Dear Possessed Toy Grill,
You sit in my office, surrounded by hundreds of other toys. YOU are the one that gives me the heebie-jeebies. Sure, you look harmless.. and you are even one of the children's favorite toys. But, you're not fooling me. You say things out of nowhere; when no one is around. Things like, "Come on! Let's fire up the grill!" You say it loud and you say it when I'm the only one in the building. I almost called the Police on you because I wasn't sure who was talking to me. (seriously) No, I do not want to play with you. Ever. I'm sorry that I hid you in the janitors closet. But, I just couldn't take your creepiness anymore. Why won't your batteries die?

Where's the cake?

2009-03-25T14:33:00.008-04:00

On my quest for all things wedding today.. I stumbled across some of the coolest wedding stuff I've ever seen. I do believe that these are blog-worthy. Today my quest consisted of Wedding cake toppers. :)

Ode to Homer Simpson

2009-03-24T10:06:00.002-04:00

"Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip" - Homer Simpson

"This donut has purple in the middle, purple is a fruit"

- Homer Simpson

"Let us celebrate our agreement with the adding of chocolate to milk." - Homer Simpson

"Marge, old people don't need companionship, they need to be isolated and studied to see what useful nutrients can be obtained from them" - Homer Simpson

Holy costume party, Batman!

2009-03-24T09:29:00.005-04:00

Yup, that's right folks.. we're gettin hitched; it's an entire weekend of fun all planned for May 1st- May 3rd. AND!!! Because we both really love free stuff.. I am inclined to tell everyone I know that we are registered at Target for wedding stuff and Babies R' Us for.. you guessed it! BABY STUFF! (keep in mind that I am in fact pregnant, so the last few aisles of Target registering is a little blurry to me.. but I'm sure that Scott registered for some really cool and INEXPENSIVE stuff. - Thanks honey!) Hooray for lifelong commitments!!

Baby

2009-03-20T13:59:00.003-04:00

Dear baby,
You are almost 19 weeks old now. Woah. (that's nearly 5 months!!!) (I know you can't add yet, and probably never will be able to since you have your mom's genes. Sorry) But, 5 months is a long time. You poke me now. I feel your little knees and elbows.. and when I poke you back, you kind of poke harder.. so I don't do it very much. You like to dance when I'm trying to sleep. You make me eat. A lot. You make me eat my vitamins. My vitamins make me pukey-feeling. You could be a girl. You could be a boy. Hopefully you're one or the other. They say that you can hear me now. I've tried to watch my language. I also try not to sing so loud in the car.. because you could be sleeping. I haven't buttoned my pants in over two weeks. I can't run, hike, roller skate, jump rope, climb, somersault, bungee jump, drive a go-kart, ice skate, raft, sled, play football, drink Dr.Pepper, or belly-flop. (bowling is still questionable) But, I love you, and will one day whoop your butt in all of those things.
See you in two weeks, baby! We love you!
a.k.a MOM

Jerky-Mc-Jerkster

2009-03-20T13:52:00.002-04:00

Dear Mr.Piece of glass that got stuck in my foot this morning,

Thanks.
A lot.
You hurt.
You hurt like hell.
You made me bend.
That hurt even more.
It hurts to bend.
(pregnant belly)
I was late to work because of you.
(and because I woke up late and stopped at McDonald's... but that's beside the point)
Not cool, piece of glass, NOT COOL.

I'm RICH!

2009-03-20T13:25:00.003-04:00

Dear Mr.Obama,
Thank you for my extra 15 dollars on my paycheck this week. Just think of all the shenanigans I can pull with 15 smack-a-roos! I just wanted to ask why the Paycheck-Gods are not happy with me. Although I appreciate my extra "incentive" for being a good, hard working American Citizen, I really think that you should have looked into other avenues for dishing out dough. You see, while you were raising my amount of take-home-pay, Mr.Health Insurance Company effictively lowered my take-home-pay. Did they know that you were planning this kind gesture? In turn, did they decide that this would be a "convenient" time to raise my insurance rates and stick me with crappier insurance? It was sort of a "YaY! BOO!" moment. (15 extra bucks! YAY! 30 less bucks! BOO!) Perhaps just a 20 in the mail would have been a little smoother.. then maybe we could have fooled those insurance scammers for once. (I know, I'm pretty optimistic)
P.S- Good job on Leno last night. You filled out brackets, watched American Idol, bowled, spent 800 Billion dollars, ran the country, and still found time to send me an extra $15. Wow. I feel the love.

Tummy Time

2009-03-17T15:22:00.004-04:00

I haven't been too inspired lately to blog. It could be that I'm trying to avoid my own smack down. (see THIS post for a recap) Or, it could be that I'm just so darn happy that there's been nothing to whine about. (blogs are good for whining) But, I DID promise some belly pictures and well, darn it.. I'm not one to disappoint... so here we go. (well, you could be disappointed because 1. my belly is not that big 2. there's only one picture)

Oh well, you asked for a picture.. You get a picture.
Enjoy.

NEED BLOGGY HELP!

2009-03-12T14:14:00.002-04:00

I want to make stuff. Sell the stuff. Pay the rent. Make more stuff. Sell that stuff. Pay more rent. (actually, this equation is way better when I don't have to pay rent...) Is there anything wrong with that? I can make stuff. I'm crafty. I see other people doing it just fine.. what's up with them?? Is this a bad time (ya know, on the verge of The 2nd Great Depression) to even think about it? Scott and I are both capable, crafty beings. We need an idea! Baby stuff comes to mind because well, I have one growing inside of me... and it's hard not to think of it often when he/she rolls around in there and elbows my bladder at inconvenient times. (such as when I'm so far back in line at the restroom that I can't even SEE the stalls from the hallway and all of the other women just ignore me as I squirm up and down, side to side, to see when in the world it will be MY turn to PEE!) Anyways, what I'm diggin for here is this: I need ideas. Will you help me become that crafty little devil that I SOOO deserve to be?

Mmmm.. Samoa cookies....
Crap. Pregnancy cravings....
See ya later Bloggies!

Junkfood Utopia

2009-03-10T12:29:00.005-04:00

I was just informed that my blogging has been well, lacking lately. Not in substance, of course, but definately in quantity. Yes, I can agree with this. So, here's a quick recap of LIFE.

Yesterday was my "monthly" pregnancy checkup at the doc's office. (17 weeks along by the way) And, as usual, I was bracing myself to be poked, prodded, and emptied. (emptied as in: urine and blood) I am starting to have no problem with this stuff, seeing as how I better damn well get used to it before good ol' month NINE. BUT, to my delight, I was neither poked, prodded or emptied yesterday. Somehow, I managed to swing a Get-out-of-Jail-free Card! This can't BE! I asked the doctor.. "what about that thing where I get naked and you poke me?" - "Nope. Not today." Maybe he was just in a good mood.. and had decided that torturing mommies-to-be just wasn't as fun as it used to be. I don't know.. but I'll take it. ANDDDD.. the only thing that he DID tell me was that I've LOST WEIGHT! Fourteen glorious pounds to be exact. In the middle of me jumping for joy, he reminded me that I'm pregnant and that this is not a good time to diet. Yah, okay, I'm not sure that there's a bad time to lose 14 pounds.. but whatever. So, doctor's orders were to scarf down as much icecream as humanly possible over the next month and put on atleast four pounds. To that challenge I said: "Hamburgers and Oreo Pie tonight baby!"

My doctor will be pleased to know that I surely gained all 14 pounds back...... last night.

Hey, doctor's orders.

Other than that, my life has been pretty dern fabulous. Scott and I went to Asheville on Saturday... had a fabulous time in 75 degree weather... hob-knobbin it with the artsy-fartsies downtown. On Sunday we did housey stuff like clean the car, laundry, re-pot Mr. Plant (for the 3rd time), and soak up the unusual spring weather that will most likely be capped off by snow flurries by the end of the week. (good ol' Tennessee weather) OH! And we hit up Casablanca on Friday at the BEaUtIfuL Tennessee Theater. I had never seen that movie.. and it was everything that I'd heard.
AnyWHO.. wish me luck on my junk food endeavor, and I will wish you luck on yours! :)

Much love..

How to Avoid a Smackdown

2009-03-05T14:32:00.009-05:00

OOO-EEEE I'm stressed today! Boss Lady is a dill weed (yah, I said it. Dill weed!), my health insurance is going up (for the 2nd time in a year) (YIPPPPIEEEEE! HOORRRAAYYY!), and my hormones are all wacky. I think I'm just in the mood to pick a fight with somebody!
Anybody?
Wanna fight me?
BRING IT!

Yah, I know, none of you want to fight a pregnant chick. Can't blame ya. I already tried picking a fight with Hubs, but he's not really in the mood to fight. (EVER) My CAT, Elsie, tried to start somethin' with me this morning... (sliding her paw underneath the bathroom door to attack my foot while I put on my mascara - causing me to let out a scream like in a bad horror movie) I SO should have put on my boxing gloves after that and met her outside, but she has claws and grose cat teeth and stuff....

Hubs tells me that sometimes I just want to pick fights with people. To that I say: NOT TRUE! But, actually, it is true... because I'm a WOMAN! (and a PREGNANT one at that!)
So, to any of you that would wish to stay on my good side.... (and not get your a** whooped by a mommy-to-be) I suggest the following:
*A donation of 1 -2 boxes of Samoas Girl Scout Cookies (preferrably wrapped in some sort of festive paper, for that added surprise)

*Two words: Back Massage

*Lies, Lies, and more lies about how simple pregnancy will be (I'm not too good for a little white lie every now and then. Sometimes the truth really does hurt.)

*Financial donations are always appreciated (no.. not a bribe to prevent that smack down) (okay, maybe a bribe)

If you are not prepared to offer ATLEAST one of these things, then I will meet you outside by the jungle gym.

Too much house

2009-03-04T10:40:00.003-05:00

This image sort of.... irked me. This is John Mayer's new "house"; which only set him back $20 MILLION. I won't go into the details of what this "house" comes with, but it will probably make you queezy to say the least. Some people might call this the feeling of jealousy, but not me. I call it frivolous spending and a plum waste of materials and energy. Correct me if I'm wrong, but John Mayer is a single guy, right? No kids? What in the world is he going to do with this house???! Stare at it?
SHEESH!

I get paid for this?

2009-03-03T16:33:00.003-05:00

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am spoiled.
For the past, oh, 7 hours, I have played on the computer... for MONEY! No, this is not some scam...
My boss pays me to sit, play, and color. AND.. If I want to pretend to sound important, I can always tell people what my office does. (not ME... but my OFFICE) Blah-deee-blah-child abuse-blah-de-prosecutes-blah-blah-[insert statistic here].. and Vwa-la!
Sure, I have to HEAR about child abuse on a daily basis.. (which I think the entire World should have to, then maybe something would be fixed in the whole big scheme of things) BUT, mainly, I play.. and I sit.. and I pretend I'm doing important stuff when people are looking. (when really, I've found some crazy game on Yahoo Games where you cook stuff and chop onions and bake egg rolls.. and..) (see my point?)
I'm spoiled, but I complain that my health insurance is too high and that I need a raise. Yes, I actually whinned (lots of times) about not getting a raise. (possibly even at lunch today) What am I smoking? I GET PAID TO PLAY. (and not $50,000/year... but definately not cruddy minimum wage either) It's so bad that most of the time I complain when I actually have real work* to do! (interrupting my Facebook browsing! How dare you!)
*Real work usually consists of walking to the mailbox or sending a fax
Wait, I still do want a raise.. and there's a valid reason why I should have one by now.. but I won't go into it because I doubt that you will feel sorry for me after I just slammed myself for being a whiney, lazy, ungrateful "employee".
AND, my health insurance should definately be lowered. Mainly because it's a rip off.
Gotta Run, finally quittin time! (as in: quit wasting time and go home)

Nonsense

2009-03-03T13:58:00.005-05:00

This blog is starting to become my venting place. I've wanted to sit down and type up a 2 page blog about money, and my job, and all of the little stresses in life.. but I've spared you from all of this. (for now) So, until I can convince myself that the World is not coming to an end.. I will fill this space with nonsense humor.
Exibit A: Tongue Twisters
If a noisy noise annoys an onion, an annoying noisy noise annoys an onion more!

The butter Betty Botter bought could make her batter bitter, so she thought she'd better buy some better butter!

Now would be the time to stop being my friend because you're way weirded out..
OR.. the time to praise me endlessly and send me lots of money?

Insert Laugh HERE

2009-03-02T12:50:00.002-05:00

2009-02-27T14:34:00.007-05:00

I am desperately trying to have a good day. Seriously. I could go on and on about my night, and insomnia, and my job, my pregnant belly (the poking from the inside), and the inability to take deep breaths without choking... but I'll spare you and myself from anymore self pity. Needless to say, I am so so so so happy that it's Friday. So happy in fact that I'm just gonna slide right into my Fun Factoid List for this week. Here goes...

FUN FACTOID FRIDAY!!!!

1. Early Human foot prints from 1.5 million years ago were just discovered in Kenya. Which leads me to ask... what about snow angels? Now, THAT would blow my mind.

2. I was two hours late to work today. (On purpose!) (yah, I know that's not really a fun factoid... but I thoroughly enjoyed it)

3. There are more collect calls on Father's Day than on any other day of the year. (ouch. Sorry pops)

4. Jupiter is bigger than all of the other planets combined. (no.. not you, Pluto, you're not a planet anymore.. remember?) :*(

5. In the White House, there are 13,092 knives, forks and spoons. (HEY! Maybe we can sell them on E-Bay for 1.7 Trillion to cover our deficit? Huh? How bout it?)

6. The average person eats about 35,000 cookies in a lifetime. (Do I still count in this statistic if I ate 34,000 cookies just this past Christmas?)

7. In Tennessee, it is against the law to drive a car while sleeping (well, dang it... guess I better go return that travel pillow and turn off the cruise control. Sheesh.)

End Factoid Rant.

Morality Vs. Functionality

2009-02-25T13:07:00.006-05:00

I'm having a moral dilema.

Here's the situation: Every few weeks our office receives donations of kids toys, clothing, books, ect. from the loving community. Now, these gifts are given with the absolute best of intentions... BUT, we have sooo many items that they are piled up to the ceiling (seriously) in every cubby and corner of office space. I know for a fact that most of those items will sit there, collecting dust for the next oh... year or so.. until someone hauls it off to the Foster Family Agency. (where it will then sit for another year or so) Well, every now and then we get some FRIGGIN CUTE baby stuff.. and well, (I think you know where I'm going with this) I'm PreGnAnT. Is it wrong of me to sift through the stuff and pick out ONE or TWO baby things??? (or four or five?)

(or seven?)

Please tell me I'm dreaming

2009-02-24T15:45:00.008-05:00

I had a dream last night that I was playing baseball with Billy Ray Cyrus (not the clean cut Billy Ray Cyrus either.. the mullet.. cheesy country star Billy Ray Cyrus) in a school lunch room- where people were dodging the ball and throwing french fries at the ref... and well, it was not pretty.

The night before, I dreamt that I was in a contest where I had to throw stuff off of a third floor balcony and try to make it land in a bucket. (needless to say, I won the contest hands down)

Three nights ago, I dreamt that a bunch of 6 year olds were throwing school supplies AND PUPPIES at me. (I mean, generally I'm all about puppies.. but throwing them??! My brain has crossed the line)

What's up with that?

Does anyone notice a parallel between these dreams? If there's anyone out there with a psychology degree.. please hook me up with some reassuring thoughts.. so that I don't lie awake wondering what's gonna be thrown at me tonight. Muchos Gracias.

2009-02-23T16:50:00.002-05:00

It's 4:50..
Almost quittin time, and all I can say about today is:
*I got schooled by a 3 year old (twice)
*My baby thinks that it's a ballerina
*Do not run and drink water
*Do not run..period, if you're pregnant.
*Sanitizer. Sanitizer. Sanitizer.
*Side note: A man in Greece escaped prison via helicopter this weekend. (for the SECOND TIME)
*A screaming child can almost always be bribed with candy.
*Same goes for a screaming adult.

NEW JOB DESCRIPTION!

2009-02-20T12:15:00.005-05:00

I decided to spare you (and myself) from another blog-o-Rants today. You are very welcome.

Good news today! I am now in charge of the office recycling program. I requested a badge of some sort, a pay raise (duh!), and a party involving pizza; but those requests were scoffed at for some reason. (hmph!) Three out of seven of us are 100% behind the recycling program.. the other 4 need some "coaxing". Actually, they just purely DO NOT CARE about our environment. I was thinking of different ways that I could convince them of the importance of recycling. Here are a few of my ideas:

Option A:

Do it like they do in those anti-smoking commercials. Instead of lining up body bags in Central Park... I will fill their offices with a month's worth of things that they SHOULD HAVE recycled. Maybe even go so far as to spread it across their desks and come in with a loud speaker and announce to the office that they DID NOT recycle this month.

Option B:

Hold an "informative" meeting about why recycling important; involving Powerpoint presentations (and hopefully a laser pointer, because who doesn't have fun with a laser pointer?) and maybe even crafts made from recycled objects. ?? (no, I do not work at a pre-school.. but probably should) I'll make sure to throw in some spicy statistics like: The production of recycled paper (as opposed to brand spankin new paper) uses 80% less water and 65% less energy and produces 95% less air polution! (No WAY, Catrina!) Yes, way.

Option C:

Sneak into their offices during lunch break and do it myself.* (could possibly be more fun with a spy kit, black light, leather gloves and a mask.)

*this option is still under review

If you have any ideas about how to spread the word around my office of slackers, please let me know. Also, to check out some more statistics to help spread the word check out THIS SITE and THIS ONE TOO!

Wait, this could have been considered as another rant. Darn it. Sorry again.

Later Taters!

My secret passion

2009-02-19T16:12:00.006-05:00

Few of you may know about my deep, dark archeology passion. Call it an obsession, call it what you will. I know more facts about things found in dirt than I do about things found in my kitchen. Now, this "hobby" of mine didn't really appear until about.. well, maybe 3 or 4 years ago??? (ya know, right when I was trying to figure out which subject to major in at school.) Somehow I missed the obvious archeology passion and went straight for the interior design, business, marketing career. And, well, look at me now... working at a Children's Advocacy Center.... digging for the truth while investigating Child Abuse. (get it.. digging for truth.. when really I just wanna dig in the dirt? Nice play on words, eh?) Now that I've finally realized that all I really wanna do is go to Egypt and brush off bones with a toothbrush, it might be a wee bit too late. One in five Archeologists is now UNEMPLOYED! The economy, plus the fact that most of the ground is currently covered with PAVEMENT and WAL-MARTS, has put my favorite people out of work. Many museums in China and India have began SELLING their artifacts to private collectors to keep the museums open. (I know, crazy, right?!!) AND... nearly half of all archeology sites are being looted, their priceless treasures being sold overseas, and on EBAY. I'm not real sure where I'm going with this; except for the fact that this is heartbreaking and truely a sign of the times. The most important book of Earth's lifetime was discovered by archeologists!!! I think that it is our duty as HUMANS to protect the land and history that came before us. By the way, the largest Mammoth fossil ever discovered was discovered outside L.A, when they were building a PARKING GARAGE... and guess what? The parking garage construction continued immediately after the mammoth was recovered (cement trucks waiting for the "hold up" to end), leaving no time to look for more artifacts. Welcome to 2009.

End rant.

For daily updates on amazing archeological finds around the world go HERE!! (my favorite website/magazine ever)

You'll poke your eye out with that thing!

2009-02-18T14:08:00.007-05:00

I was cleaning my office today (yay! Go me!) and simultaneously attempted to give myself a black eye. I know, I have MAD skills, right? You all just WISH that you were as talented as I am! (or.. well.. clumsy) I was just sitting there, taking in the clean freshness of an orderly desk, when out of nowhere... I JAMMED MY FINGER IN MY EYE. What was I doing? Fixing my makeup? Reaching for something? It's all such a blurr, that I've convinced myself that there was a lapse in memory... maybe a concussion? Maybe my arm just spazzed out for a second and WHAM! If I was attempting to fix my makeup... THIS was NOT the way to do it. UNLESS by "fixing" I meant: to cry black mascara tears all over my bright yellow sweater, lose any and all makeup that was once on my right eyelid, and make a total fool of myself while trying to explain that I wasn't upset but that I had randomly stuck my finger in my eye. Yah, somehow I'm supposed to raise a child in five months...and when my child sticks her finger in her eye, I will have nothing to say to that.

But anyways, I cleaned my office today; it's gotten mixed reviews from my coworkers. (some of which asked me if I was quitting soon because it looked so empty) --(I WISH!!! Actually, I've quit this job several times in my dreams..... mmmmm) But, no, I'm not quitting. (unfortunately)

Here is a list of items that were removed from my office:
1. A broken printer
2. Two broken telephones
3. Four boxes of papers left by my bossdude over the past year (WHICH I will promptly recycle)
4. Two tubs of candy from three Halloweens ago
5. My New York Jets autographed picture of Chad Pennington (1. because they suck 2. because Chad betrayed us 3. because it wasn't feng shui enough)
6. Three boxes of USED file folders that got sent to my office to die about six months ago (my office reaks of death by abandonment)
7. Two stinky candles. (my Super-Sniffer couldn't take the smell of Cinammon/Musk/Vanilla/Christmas Trees anymore)
8. Stuffed animals, fake plants soaked in dust, phone books from 2005, and one case of recalled toys made with lead.
9. Oh yeah, and ONE cowbell.
10. Not to mention about 1o tons of dust

:) Hooray for junk-free-spaces

Yes, Fun Factoids AGAIN!

2009-02-17T13:48:00.002-05:00

1. The NEW Minute Maid Pomegranate Lemonade is a must-have. No need to further this statement, just please, take my word for it.
2. My Valentine's Day was spent at The Knoxville Zoo! My favorite thing at the zoo was the GOATS. I almost stole one, but there was no room in the car. It would suck to lose your seat in the car to a GOAT.
3. I might have gotten my boss in trouble today. I will definately go into detail about this at a later time. (Trina = 1, Boss Lady= ZERO)
4. I just had a 3-4 minute daydream about taking a hot bath. (that might be TMI?)
5. I am fresh out of fun factoids for today.

Let the nesting begin!!

2009-02-17T13:10:00.003-05:00

Maybe it's some sort of maternal, caveman, billion-year-old instinct.... but something inside me is on fire! I must nest! I must prepare! I must have every detail figured out of baby's arrival!! Wait, SLOW DOWN WOMAN! (I'm only 14 weeks pregnant) Is this too soon to start panicking? Of course, having Parents Magazine and Family Circle and blah-blah-baby magazines thrown at my desk, doesn't really help. I read a few things today that I probably could have done without. BUT, I must say that the "nesting" process is going nicely so far... I picked out a few baby outifits yesterday, and that got me pretty derrn excited. (by the way.. they were baby GIRL outfits)

AnyWHO....

Scott and I have many, many things going on this month and in March, and well... in April too. We can let stress pile up quickly, but we're learning how to help eachother get through it. We both have a very strong faith in the fact that we will be OKAY no matter what.

Yah, well..enough rambling...

The message of today's blog is that I'm so unbelievably happy and blessed.

Thank you for today.